The Act Secretly Masturbating While Telling People You Need to Charge Your Phone,
This Comes from the uses of the 'Wank Band Product'
This Comes from the uses of the 'Wank Band Product'
by TheBanterLamp August 14, 2016

When a person is mentally incapable of functioning whilst having any sort of mobile device in front of them. Typically characterized by open, slack jaw, glassy eyes and a zombie-like sway or teeter.
by Baxter Wilde August 22, 2014

A person who insists on talking or texting but doesn't provide any meat to the conversation, thus wasting your time.
John: "I'm so fed up with Teresa; she's a total phone vegan."
Conversation of a phone vegan:
Teresa: Hi.
John: Hey, what's up? How have you been?
Teresa: Nuthin. Good.
John: ... That's good. What did you want to talk about?
Teresa: Idk.
Conversation of a phone vegan:
Teresa: Hi.
John: Hey, what's up? How have you been?
Teresa: Nuthin. Good.
John: ... That's good. What did you want to talk about?
Teresa: Idk.
by Captain Battletoads, Ph.D. December 13, 2012

Describing a situation where an unintended text recipient who is not acquainted with the sender in real life responds to the text in a humorous manner.
Sender: Hey can you bring da money to udz? ima going home n make frybread for yr bro.
Unintended recipient: Hey, ur txting the wrong number, but I'll take some frybread.
Sender: LMFAO o shit sry
PHONE ROLLED!
Unintended recipient: Hey, ur txting the wrong number, but I'll take some frybread.
Sender: LMFAO o shit sry
PHONE ROLLED!
by Rulacho September 4, 2013

A functional mobile cellular communications device that is cobbled together from various random, unusable or even un-related components.
Shit, man. That new iPhone costs over a grand! $250 hot or off the Dark-Net...Looks like I get to keep my Chinese Franken-phone 'till those prices drop to reasonable.
by YAWA February 12, 2020

Small silver block that characters on detective television shows,all the CSIs, and "House" pull out of their pockets when the writers can't get off the bong long enough to come up with a better plot device. This cube magically give the characters the next surprising clue which allows the story to dangle or move to its surprise ending, depending on how close to the end of the hour it is. See DNA EVIDENCE
Plot direction:
Caruso:I'll see you in hell/jail/syndication.
(reach into pocket for cell phone) Caruso (pause, adjust glasses, or draw back sport coat to get good handle on waist). I'm coming in.
Peripheral Snarky CSI Staffer: Who was that?
Caruso: They found-the murder weapon/killer/a time slot for CSI Des Moines.
Caruso:I'll see you in hell/jail/syndication.
(reach into pocket for cell phone) Caruso (pause, adjust glasses, or draw back sport coat to get good handle on waist). I'm coming in.
Peripheral Snarky CSI Staffer: Who was that?
Caruso: They found-the murder weapon/killer/a time slot for CSI Des Moines.
by Pantaloon January 12, 2008

The head phones one uses to masturbate with. Usually used to keep the pornographic sounds from entering other's ears that are near.Are usually covered in semen.
Guy #1 Hey why are these headphones so sticky?
Guy #2 Oh yes, those would be my jizz phones.
Guy #1 *Throws headphones*
Guy #2 Oh yes, those would be my jizz phones.
Guy #1 *Throws headphones*
by guy # 2 August 6, 2010
