Closet Retard

Someone who feigns intelligence but in actuality is no more intelligent that an average retard

John: He used ironic wrong. I think he meant coincidental.

Lisa: Ya, he's a "closet retard".

by Bytesthedust January 3, 2018

Closet mo

Closet mo,
When someone you know pretends to be, or acts straight all the while exhibiting homosexual habits or tendencies, for example making countless gay jokes to cover his own tendancies, or dating attractive women as a cover up

Our friend Tyler B. Has a hot girlfriend allison but we all know he wishes she was His boyfriend, soon she'll figure out he's a

"closet mo"

by gingerjesus January 1, 2015

walk-in closet

A closeted married man who hosts young men when his wife is out shopping

I went over to this guys house and he was a total walk-in closet. His wife came back with shopping bags right as we were finishing up.

by killfukmary October 10, 2014

closet fuckboy

someone who looks like a gentleman but is actually a fuckboy

"that guy looks really nice"
"hes not he is really closet fuckboy"

by sophies sh*t November 27, 2016

Closet Doug

a secret competitive eater

Bob looked at the pile of brownies he was tempted to devour and realized he was a closet doug.

by Team Incredibly Awesome May 4, 2011

Closet Directioner

a directioner that refuses to tell anyone that they like One Direction; they know all of their songs, own a bunch of merchandise, and secretly dance around in their room to WMYB; usually happens with boys that are in denial about liking pop music. in fact, they are so in denial that they are drowning

OMG, Stacy, Darren is such a Closet Directioner! I saw him dancing in his room to What Makes You Beautiful, and i took pictures and videos!

by Kaeree36 April 29, 2015

locked in the closet

The inability to come out gay because of the possibility of brutal retaliation from others. This could include being targeted by anti-gay groups, being avoided by your friends, etc.

Daniel wanted to come out, but because he lived near the Westboro Baptist Church, he was basically locked in the closet.

by MexiGin May 14, 2012