slit taint

the slicing of the taint vertically, to create an artificial vagina on men, so they may be fingered, eaten out, and penetrated as they so wish, even if it is a bloody fucking mess.

Note: Must be cauterized with a curling iron when slit to avoid it healing and having to be re-opened

Oliver loves to have dirty hookers lap at his bloody slit taint.

by Dr. Slitaintosaurus December 17, 2009

Alpha Taint

When you cut along someones ass hole across their taint and along to their genatalia. This will create a great hole that must be dug out and cleaned. Although it is no longer a taint, it is called an Alpha Taint because of where the incisions are.

Nolan: Wow Clara, thats a nice Alpha Taint you have there.

Clara: Yea I know, you can stick your whole head up my Alpha Taint

by John Denson April 22, 2011

taint wagon

The fallacious act of rapidly tonguing someone's taint. The term requires that there is a continuous sequence of individuals, in a line, rapidly tonguing each others taints.

Did you hear about the party at Samantha's Sweet 16? Heard there was a vicious taint wagon!

by totesmehgotes February 8, 2015

Tainted Auger

an unskilled gamer that likes to play a spreadsheet games about imaginary space boats in space.

Hey where has john been hiding?
that guy has been a tainted auger lately, he is always playing Astro Empires

by astrozombie420 August 5, 2011

taint mole

a mole located on the taint; also, a small, furry mammal that dwells in the rectum and emerges during sexual intercourse to perch on the taint and observe

"What the fuck is that thing?!" "Oh, don't worry, that's just my taint mole. He's harmless."

by cock turtle June 11, 2006

Taint Brush

also known as a "Soul Patch." Hair grown below the lower lip and above the chin. So named for its applications in oral sex. Useful for accusing friends of homosexuality.

Nice beard guy, how does your boyfriend like the taint brush?

by DavidFourFingers March 12, 2010

taint meat

the part between the pussy and ass

if the taint is brown dont go down!

by joe crackhead July 27, 2003