The Lonely Blumpkin

When one tries to suck his own cock while shitting

I tried to suck my own cock while shitting. It was the lonely blumpkin.

by metalmetalrob February 26, 2010

Space Blumpkin

The act, practice, or habit of performing or participating in a blumpkin in space.

True to her name, Sally Ride was a frequent participant in that variant of blumpkins known as the space Blumpkin - an act made more wistful and gainfully frissonable by the inclusion of vacuum toilets and space astronaut diapers.

by bloom ken January 16, 2010

Green Blumpkin

When you get your dick sucked while taking a shit while smoking a big fat blunt.

Guy One: Dude guess what!?!
Guy Two: What?
Guy One:My girl gave me a Green Blumpkin!
Guy Two: Mann thats sooo disgusting but soooo awesome *fist pump*

by Operation Asian Invasion July 12, 2010

Alabama Blumpkin

A sex act in which you are taking a shit on the toilet and you are giving a blowjob to someone who is of direct relation, ie cousin.

My mom walked in while I was giving Brian an Alabama Blumpkin. I wasn't invited to the next Easter.

by mommysmilk April 17, 2021

Blumpkin Spice

Noun. A variant of the traditional “blumpkin,” a Blumpkin Spice is getting head from the barista while taking a shit at your local Starbucks.

“Bro, Becky hooked it up with a venti Blumpkin Spice last night!”

by N8Ball_CornerPocket October 8, 2017

French Blumpkin

A variation of the traditional Blumpkin, performed while cleaning one's undercarriage on a Bidet.

Always a classy gentlemen, Martine opted to forego the often dirty Blumpkin for the more hygienic French Blumpkin. Stacey was appreciative of the fact she didn't have to taste his shit.

by PV Kings November 12, 2012

bisacodyl blumpkin

When you're preppin' for your colonoscopy and she give's you a blow job.

Man, that colonoscopy prep was brutal except for that bisacodyl blumpkin.

by Bisacodyl Boo Boo Babe April 2, 2017