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quagmire

sex crazed character on The Family Guy. He is awesome and says some really funny things.
Peter: "I need to find a way to make 50,000 dollars." Quagmire: "You could whore yourself off to 50 fat chicks for 1000 dollars...Fat chicks need love too, they just gotta pay for it."
by marcus mazurik October 5, 2005
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Quality VS Quantity

A hella ugly lookin dude with a huge dick vs a hella good lookin dude with a chode
i dont think u want an example
by HAzE July 29, 2004
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Quagmire

Sex craved pervert from the funniest show ever, Family Guy
Quagmire sees a cheerleader tied up in a bathroom stall

Quagmire: Dear diary: Jackpot.

Brain: Ugh, I can't beileve you're serving a three year sentance, it seems so harsh.

Lois: Well, the only upside is that it's given me time to think about why I ended up in here. I guess I was stealin' because I was so sick of the same old routine. I felt like I had a void in my life, like, like, there was a secret hole in me...
Quagmire: Oh God!

Lois:...and I was tryin' to fill that hole with all kinds of expensive objects, and things...

Quagmire: Oh God!!!

Lois: ...and I felt wonderful with all those things fillin' that hole.

Quagmire: Oh God!!!!!!

Lois: I did this to myself, so I'm just gonna have to lay back and let the penal system teach me a lesson.

Quagmire: That one is also sexual.

Quagmire: My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gagoogidy that girl. I gashmoygadied her gaflavity with my googus. And I am sorry.

Quagmire: Hello, and welcome to another edition of Midnight Q. Tonight we're gonna enjoy some jazz from Charles Mingus. Norman Maylor's here to read an excerpt from his latest work. And we also have a girl from Omaha hiding a banana. We're gonna find out where. Giggity giggity. Giggity goo. Stick around.

Peter: I'm gonna go microwave a bagel and have sex with it.
Quagmire: Butter's in the fridge!

Quagmire: I felt guilty once, but she woke up halfway through. Giggtty

(In the middle of the night, Peter wakes the whole neighborhood by yelling.)
Peter: Hey everybody! Meg just had her first period!
Joe: PETER! Shut up its three in the morning!
Cleveland: What the hell is going on out there?!
Quagmire: Damn it! People are trying to sleep!
Peter: I'm just saying! I'm proud of her. She's a woman! Yea!
Quagmire: Yes, Peter, that's very hot, and I'll deal with it in the morning, but right now, I am exhausted!

Quagmire: Hey Peter, uhh you have a card for if you transfered V.D. to somebody.
Peter: Uhh lets see here...uhh yep, "Sorry I accidentally gave you V.D."
Quagmire: Huh, that's all you have is accidental huh? All right I'll take it.

Quagmire: You must be this beautiful to ride the Quagmire.
by Seth Mcfarlane August 15, 2009
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Quality vs. Quantity

having really good bud over having alot of commerical grade bud.
my boyz alwayz smoke that madd good quality homegrown shit not that back yard brown shit
by ME September 28, 2004
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quagmire

Hoplessly Sticky Oppressive Situation in which no matter how you try escape is nearly impossible!
Character in a cleverly vieled propiganda FOX cartoon similar to Simpsons
Obama inherited a financial political quagmire intentionally created by the republican party to foil american health insurance reform,hopes, dreams and lives while the media lies seal our fates.

Although the Hopes of the majority of America were awakened the Quagmire of political self interest and greed continued to murder the uninsured!
by hatchetman...heads on posts August 16, 2009
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quality v. quantity

deciding whether to pursue a hot piece of ass that might cost you some effort, or taking the first mangy-ass smelly bitch that stumbles across your path
This woman is really quite attractive and respectable, but since I'm such an unabashed man-whore I'll take the mole-ridden skank with a screamin' case of cock rot.
by collegesucks2001 December 8, 2003
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