Squirrel Monkey Rodeo

An impossible or seemingly impossible assignment or request. A task so time consuming, daunting or complicated that you feel you may as well have been asked to round up Squirrel Monkeys (A basic assumption must first exist that Squirrel Monkeys are pretty fucking hard to round up).

I got back from my two week vacation and a Squirrel Monkey Rodeo was in my fucking in-box. I'm going to castrate the piece of shit who was supposed to work my mail while I was out!

I have to drop the kids off at soccer practice and then go grocery shopping, pick the dog up from the vet, and pick up the dry cleaning in time to go back and pick up the screaming maggots from soccer practice again. What a fucking Squirrel Monkey Rodeo!

Squirrel Monkey Rodeo by The Broodwich June 13, 2007

squirrel pile 

Small pile of laundry or junk. Usually left with the intent of being cleared up later, but normally isn't.

"My husband keeps leaving squirrel piles around the house."

squirrel pile by VengeanceVali May 1, 2009

squirrel mating 

The act of having sex upside down in a closet.

Omg, did you know that Regina and Kade squirrel mated at the party last night?
WTF, get out, we're squirrel mating right now.

squirrel mating by siprofesora November 23, 2016

squirrel shower

A type of shower in which no shampoo, soap, or any other cleaning thing is used.

The $&@&ing hotel was out of soap and shampoo so I took a quick squirrel shower.

squirrel shower by Gian Luca’s March 10, 2018

Squirrel cheekin’ 

When a girl puts the whole male sack in her mouth and moves each nut to one side of her mouth.

Damn that girl gave me the best squirrel Cheekin’ Of my life last night

Squirrel cheekin’ by Brice Thomas/Sean Turner August 4, 2018

Squirrel Feather 

A squirrel feather is a poster child for abortion, mentally challenged, bushy haired, annoying, short-near dwarfism, unstable minded, constantly pacing and pretending to have self-worth in heroism and creating the illusion that people actually care about them. When a squirrel feather feels that they are not being heard, they raise their voice rudely interrupting individuals that actually know what is going on only to make themselves look like a jackass in front of others. You can often hear a squirrel feather repeating phrases like "...and stuff like that" or "as far as it goes"...only leading others into confusion on how far it really does go. A squirrel feather can usually be found staring off into space usually confused about easy tasks and making no sense whatsoever in anything and having extreme difficulty in making any decisions on any simple task. Hobbies of squirrel feather are staring uncomfortably at a man getting undressed and making a suggestive reminder in a unsettling creapy tone that its time to take a shower to another man-often resulting in that man feeling extremely uncomfortable. Squirrel feathers are usually kinfolk of Jimmys and are most often little brothers of Jimmys.

There goes squirrel feather saving the plant one light fixture at a time....what a little idiot!

Squirrel Feather by Mick267 January 16, 2020

Squirrel Piss 

The last bit of a beer. It contains a solids that have settled. It's best to be poured out.

Jeff - "Ah man, you just drank the squirrel piss!"
Ben - "Ugh. I wasn't paying attention. I'll have to wash it down with another beer"

Squirrel Piss by AmazingEngineer June 14, 2008