lance armstrong

lance armstrong's genes hold the secret to curing cancer. He can sweat out cancer and crap out tumors. Every exwife of Lance Armstrong has cancer because he can actually will it into people's system. The friction from Lance's bike powers Zeus's lightning bolts. No matter where you are and no matter where lance is he will beat you in a race to anywhere.

Lance Armstrong ejected cancer from his body so forcibly that a testicle shot off.

by RocktheJordan August 16, 2006

lance armstrong

When playing pong and only having one ball because all others were lost, too dirty, or crushed in the process of beer pong.

bob: yo man wheres the other ball?
todd: dunno man, guess we're gonna have to lance armstrong it
bob: goddamnit

by fattehboi November 2, 2008

lance armstrong

Sexual phenomenon in which the female kicks her legs during intercourse, i.e. as the pedals of a bicycle turn.

She was so turned on she went lance armstrong on me after just five minutes.

by ozMo January 12, 2007

the lance armstrong

the Lance Armstrong is when you sit on a girls face, grip her hair with both hands, and pedal her ears all while sticking one testicle in her mouth.

After I gave her the Lance Armstrong, she was speechless, unable to return any means of conversation!

by PhusionDev July 24, 2006

Lance Armstrong

The greatest cyclist that we have seen for a long time. Triathlete-turned cycling legend, was diagnosed with advanced testicular cancer at the age of 25, was only given a 40-50% chance to live, survived, and went on to win a record 7 Tours de France. He is now retired, but is still very much invovled in the cycling and cancer communities, and has his own foundation, the Lance Armstrong Foundation. He started the Livestrong wristbands and also has a Livestrong clothing line and a 10/2 clothing line (10/2=October 2, the day Lance was diagnosed) and a US dollar from each product sold goes to the LAF. An amazing human being, and we won't see someone like him for a long time to come.

Lance Armstrong is an eight year cancer survivor!

by LanceIsMyHero December 26, 2005

lance armstrong

the american who rides bicycles better than the french.

Lance Armstrong rapes all europeans when it comes to bike racing. Other americans are just so fat, they had no chance of competing with him to begin.

by Nicolas Sarkozy September 30, 2007

Lance Armstrong

A man who overcame testicular cancer and has won the Tour de France numerous times. He also has his own line of yellow wristbands that are nothing short of sweet.

Lance Armstrong will do more than you ever will and he has only one nut.
Imagine if he had two....

by Ryan Agee May 24, 2007