Lance Armstrong

Ever get a bag of shelled peanuts and you pull one out of the bag and it looks normal but then you crack it open and there's only 1 nut on the inside? That's a Lance Armstrong.
I'm still hungry for nuts. This bag is full of Lance Armstrongs.
by thiisnotmyrealname January 29, 2015
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A man who can do more with one testicle than most could do with a pair.
Lance Armstrong rides his bike fast. With one testicle.
by captain kirks number 2 bowl October 12, 2005
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a term used for the purchace of a half sack of weed.
Tommy:"hey man im all out, can i get a lance armstrong?"
Shawn: "yea dude. Stop smoking all your shit so quick!"
Tommy: "Some one should of told that to Michael Phelps!"
by DrgDlr420xx September 10, 2009
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lance armstrong's genes hold the secret to curing cancer. He can sweat out cancer and crap out tumors. Every exwife of Lance Armstrong has cancer because he can actually will it into people's system. The friction from Lance's bike powers Zeus's lightning bolts. No matter where you are and no matter where lance is he will beat you in a race to anywhere.
Lance Armstrong ejected cancer from his body so forcibly that a testicle shot off.
by RocktheJordan August 17, 2006
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When playing pong and only having one ball because all others were lost, too dirty, or crushed in the process of beer pong.

bob: yo man wheres the other ball?
todd: dunno man, guess we're gonna have to lance armstrong it
bob: goddamnit
by fattehboi September 20, 2008
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Sexual phenomenon in which the female kicks her legs during intercourse, i.e. as the pedals of a bicycle turn.
She was so turned on she went lance armstrong on me after just five minutes.
by ozMo January 11, 2007
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the american who rides bicycles better than the french.
Lance Armstrong rapes all europeans when it comes to bike racing. Other americans are just so fat, they had no chance of competing with him to begin.
by Nicolas Sarkozy September 16, 2007
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