This Just In: You're a Jackass

A smart-ass retaliation to the insult Newsflash: I don't care.

Dude 1: Hey, did you know I just got a raise?
Dude 2: Newsflash: I don't care.
Dude 1: This just in: you're a jackass.

by _allismine_ May 17, 2006

jackalmind

An intelligently opportunistic and predatory manner of thinking.

She is a very forceful person with jackalmind and she uses it to beat out her competitors.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 8, 2019

Two faced Jackal-Rat

A Jackal Rat that has 2 faces and lives in the wild. It is a large brown rat that looks and talks like a human. However this is not the case. This rat commonly inhabits caves or crypts. It is easily identifiable by its unique characteristics. It is mainly nocturnal but will go out into the sunlight when necessary. It enjoys watching tv in the day and depends on other people getting it mcdonalds to survive. It is however omnivorousness and will eat plants when encountered. the The jackal rat poops 4 to 5 times a day. These poops are small and it will never flush them. The jackal rat also has flushphobia. It is however ashamed of its own poop and will put the lid down. A easy way to identify the Jackal Rat is when you walk into a bathroom and see the lid down. If you encounter this do not panic, but be aware the jackalrat may be in the area. The jackalrat is also easily identified by its lack of clothing. It will commonly only wear tighty whities and will wear clothes only when absolutely necessary. They are no violent unless provoked, and then they can become enraged, screaming and cursing. The jackalrat does NOT like to be called a 2 faced jackalrat, and if one says it they may anger it. When cornered or endangered, the jackalrat will cry and pretend to be hurt. However, this is all a ploy by the jackal rat to get out of a bad situation. It usually works and people feel bad for it. Be careful when approaching a jackal rat!

Two men go into a public bathroom:

Man 1: Yo someone put the seat down and didnt flush!

Man 2: OH shit a Two faced Jackal-Ratt must be in the area.

Man 1: A two faced what?!

Man 2: Shhh if you shout its name it may hear and become enraged!

by Jackalratexpert23 July 21, 2011

jackaloon

a publicly acceptable way of calling someone a jackass. someone who recently has done something stupid and deserves to be called a jackass, but there are people around that wouldn't appreciate that and so you simply call them a jackaloon.

"Dude what's wrong with your toaster?" "You have to plug it in first you jackaloon."

by inandaroundyourmouth February 3, 2010

jackass

1)n. A type of Donkey
2)n. A stupid or idiotic person
3)n. A show on MTV in which people preform dangeorus stunts that look pretty cool.
4)n. See: Edwin cruz

1. I own some donkeys and some jackasses.
2. Stop being a jackass, Kayla!
3. I'm going to watch Jackass.
4. Go away and get a life, jackass!

by Anonymous June 16, 2003

jackaholic

To masturbate very frequently, at least 6 times or more daily. usually a twelve or thirteen year old who is very horny.

"Son!" Wes mother? "You are such a jackaholic!" "I know."

by raven January 28, 2003

jimmy jackass

offesive term that describes a flamboyant person who lacks a firm grip on reality

in mixed company "JJ" can be used

"Look at that guy! Swerving through rush hour traffic. While smoking and yakking away on the phone." "What a Jimmy Jackass!"

by Courvoisier T. Johannsen September 28, 2006