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crane theory

The theory that all cranes are derived from previous cranes. All cranes build subsequent cranes. However, this creates a contradiction. From where were the first cranes derived? This is where crane theory steps in. God created a certain number of initial natural cranes. These cranes were perfect. They can nowadays typically be found in remote areas where it would otherwise be impossible to build a crane from scratch. Cities emerged in their current locations because there was originally a high concentration of the original cranes there.
Clay: "Hey dude, check out that crane."

Brantley: "That one is kind of out there by itself...it must be one of the originals."

Clay: "Originals?!"

Brantley: "Yea, God built the first cranes - it's how all subsequent cranes were built. Haven't you ever heard of crane theory?"

Clay: "OIC."
by gtbcb February 17, 2009
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Crane-claw

The act of holding a fork or spoon as a base and using the index finger to grab any food and pull the food onto the pre-mentioned base. It allows for mass contamination of food.
Did you see Uncle Steve come in and crane-claw that slice of ham? I'm not going to eat any more of that.
by Randy Gato II January 2, 2012
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crane cowboy

A person that has the skills to pay the bills when it comes to heavy lifting and shady rigging principles. This person has the shadiest rigging technique and can sneak it by an osha inspector and usually wears a cowboy hat hard hat.
That Larry is a serious crane cowboy when it comes to gettin shit done, all he needs now is a mic ultra and his horse
by TyroneJefferson February 22, 2021
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Lee Crane

Usually a cunt, plays minecraft and his father works as a builder. They are also on government funding, aka the dole
Lee Crane; I just got a new rocking chair!
Jamie; who gives a fuck
by camping_chair November 6, 2019
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Gib-crane

A derogatory name used to criticize a thoroughly unintelligent worker. Typically a manual worker that does very stupid things.
That dumb yardman was supposed to plant flowers; instead he cut down all the plants. He is such a gib-crane.
by Dr Piggapuss February 5, 2022
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playing the crane game

When a man gets a hand job from a blind woman.
See that girl over there? With the dog and the stick and the nice rack? Looks like she's ready for playing the crane game.
by TomKVideo December 17, 2008
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Upside-Down Crane Dropper

A sex position, invented by a future Principal and his former student, where the girl lays on a bed with her head dangling off. The guy, with penis erect, drops the crane directly into the girl's mouth. The girl then proceeds to give a sweet blow job. Most women think this is a stupid move, however, it isn't. It's awesome.
I put my girl in the upside-down crane dropper last night and she loved it!
by Junior Whatacock August 16, 2014
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