Skip to main content

Use the Paddles

A phrase often used on people in trouble or requesting help. Unlike conventional phrases, it means that you can't help them, and they're on their own. Coined by a bystander watching a man trying to fight pirates off his paddle boat, but was overpowered.

Usually used in cases when the troubled person has no hope of winning otherwise, or is very likely to fail without outside support.
Soldier: "Sir! The enemy broke through our defenses! We can't hold them off!"
Commander: "USE THE PADDLES!"

Student 1: "Hey, I forgot to study for the test today. Any advice you could give me?"
Student 2: "Well, I guess you have to use the paddles."
Student 1: "Aw, shit."
by AdmiralofShe October 16, 2016
mugGet the Use the Paddles mug.

Paddle faster, I hear banjos!

A common exclamation when in or around hillbilly infested areas. Doesn't necessarily need to be used when in a canoe; merely a warning to the other non-hillbillies in the vicinity.
It was a bright and sunny day when my father and I decided to go fishing down by the ol' waterhole. I remember that the seagulls looked like delicate little clouds, fluttering in the breeze. We made our way to our canoe and rowed out, fishing rods in hand and a song in our hearts. As we made our way down to the waterhole, we became aware of an eerie silence. The trees around us swayed to a halt. Then, quietly at first but raising in intensity, we heard the twang of a banjo. My father turned to me, his face colorless as he said "Paddle faster, I hear banjos!"
by Survival Guide May 12, 2010
mugGet the Paddle faster, I hear banjos! mug.

piddled-off

When a TV program (such as the news or other current events program) forces heavy censorship, they urge the reporters, narrators, and other crew to say something like piddled-off instead of pissed-off.
{Narrator}:
"In this video, you'll see what happens when one piddled-off idiot takes things way too far."
by Telephony December 16, 2016
mugGet the piddled-off mug.

Piddle Plopping

The act of peeing and pooping at the same time.
In order to save time in the bathroom, I started piddle plopping.
by frump dump slump March 14, 2009
mugGet the Piddle Plopping mug.

Puddlebutt

A classic dad insult for someone who is moving very slowly or not at all, particularly in traffic. Great for use in traffic when the guy in front of you is just sitting there with a green left turn arrow.

It's origin might be drawn from a situation where someone is so slow or lazy, that they pee their pants while sitting on the couch, hence sitting in a puddle of their own pee. But the word could just as easily be from a random combination of words thrown together in the heat of road rage.
Idiot 1: Sitting in car texting while the light turns green
Dad 1: *Beeps horn* Move your as* you puddlebutt!
by JobeOneKenobi July 12, 2020
mugGet the Puddlebutt mug.

lust puddle

noun.
1) a condition of being weak in the knees and drooly when met by an object of lust.
2) resultant wetness left in one's underwear from being in such lust
3) the juices left in one's bed after a prolonged sex session.
Oh God, I just melted into a lust puddle.
by augratin April 15, 2007
mugGet the lust puddle mug.

Cunt puddle

A puddle of female ejaculate or a "wet patch" left by a girl after she has had a mind blowing orgasm. only achieved by mind blowing Cunnilingus or sex with a man that is well-informed or experienced in sexual intercourse. Many people might claim they've left a girl with a 'cunt puddle' but actually havent.
OMG i fucked her so hard she squirted everywhere and left a massive cunt puddle!
by kxlee1234 September 10, 2020
mugGet the Cunt puddle mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email