microsoft

Noun. A small, flaccid penis.

Suzy was disappointed to see John had a microsoft.

by Lord_G September 27, 2017

Microsoft Wordjacked

A) When you have a Microsoft Word document you need to edit but only have access to OpenOffice or WordPad.

B) When you need to edit Microsoft Word 2007 documents but only have access to Word 2003 (and no way to download the stupid compatibility pack).

(Dude 1) Dude, how am I supposed to edit this, it's a file full of windings!

(Dude 2) Gotta love it. Microsoft Wordjacked.

by arrggggg May 15, 2009

Microsoft Office

Unaffordable software that now can be obtained for free practically anywhere.

I couldn't afford microsoft office, so I downloaded it off limewire, stole it from school, and traded it for a lollipop with my friend at school.

by thejamdude January 5, 2006

Microsoft Teams

A synonym for pure pain of the soul. It is the impending suffering of all high school students across the planet. Everyone exposed to this horrific melancholic diabolical beast of an application will not escape without scars.

I am feeling a bit Microsoft Teams today.

by KELR04 February 9, 2021

This problem was caused by Windows. This program was created by Microsoft Corporation. Microsoft Corporation does not currently have a solution for the problem that you reported.

The most common, if not the only message you will see when linking to Microsoft's "solution pages" after using the error reportingfeature

Example: When my PC couldn't play music due to a "missing audio device error" I linked to this message screen.
So I went looking on message boards for similar issue and found one. The person posted about how Microsoft had nothing.
That forum entry was posted two YEARS before.

Me: Oh cool! I can just link to Microsoft's solution page! How convenient....

This problem was caused by Windows. This program was created by Microsoft Corporation. Microsoft Corporation does not currently have a solution for the problem that you reported.

Me: You've got to be kidding. Oh Cool! Windows has a built-in help program....

by Lig Na Baste January 16, 2008

Nintendo VS Microsoft VS Sony

A war that happened several centuries ago. Nintendo was amongst the elder kingdoms, and Microsoft and Sony soon were on their way to becoming Top Dogs. The time eventually did come, and all hell broke loose. The Big 3 kingdoms decided to remain neutral, until an annual event by the name of E3 came along. All hell broke loose over and over. Gamers to this day argue which of the Big 3 Ancient kingdoms are better. Those kingdoms have evolved into companies. Although the annual E3 is still around today, the fighting amongst Nintendo, Microsoft, and Sony, is a fight of words, not weapons (unfortunately).

Note: This example is based on stereotypes, not my opinion

NintendoFanboy: We have better variety in games!
MicrosoftFanboy: We can play games like Halo on the 360 AND our computers!
SonyFanboy: Our games ALWAYS look the best!

AppleFanboy: Haha I got a phone that I can make calls AND play videogames on!

SonyFanboy: Um guys...
NintendoFanboy: Shall we?
MicrosoftFanboy: Our fighting shall resume after this!

The Big 3 Fanboys proceed to murder the AppleFanboy. Task is completed. The fighting resumes. It is unknown if the Nintendo VS Microsoft VS Sony War will ever die.

by JohnsonPwns February 15, 2012

Microsoft Sam

The most common default text-to-speech voice on Microsoft Windows computers. MS Sam is often used to say funny words or to sound like a helicopter.

You may also know MS Sam from the YouTube series, Arby and the Chief; MS Sam plays Chief.

Classroom friend, Joe: "Hey Matt, watch this!"
Microsoft Sam: "Penis"
Classroom friend, Matt: "Hah! You made him say penis"
Teacher: "Hey! Who said penis?!"

by KenzelC April 10, 2010