Fortune Cootchie

fortune cootchie
A 'cootchie', or vagina, in which is found large sums of cash. It has become this way either because the woman is a stripper, or because of some sort of sick fetish involving dollar bills and/or gold ingots. Also used to describe a woman of execptional beauty.
This term is a play on words derived from 'fortune cookie', the small cookies given away free at chinese restaurants that contain a 'fortune', a prediction of good luck or a small proverb.

"That bitch got fortune cootchie!" the shopping-cart-pushing man called out as the well endowed woman walked past.
The stripper said to Dave: "Crack open my fortune cootchie and see what suprise is waiting inside".
"You want see fortune cootchie?" the prostitute asked in broken english.

by Wayhard January 17, 2008

fortune nookie

That's what you get combining Chinese new year and Valentine's day.......

Do you really need one?

by Toimitus May 5, 2003

fortune cookie game

when the fortune is read, the words "in bed" are added to the end. this makes for extrememly amusing results.

"my friends and i love playing the fortune cookie game...once, i got a fortune that said 'don't panic...in bed.'"

by love me i'm a liberal March 19, 2007

Fortune Shitting

Eating a fortune cookie whole, then shitting out your fortune.

Friend 1: Dude! You need to break open that fortune cookie before you eat it!

Friend 2: Don't worry, I'm fortune shitting it.

Friend 1: Oh, well its gonna be a shitty fortune then.

by MagnificationMan August 26, 2013

fortune 500 mind

People with Fortune 500 minds are phenom's and run empires. You have the street smart type like Big Meech, Jay z, LOX, Nas, SUBZERO GROOVE, El Chapo, Jeezy, E40, BIGGIE, TUPAC, and are grade A upper echelon Puppet Masters similar to the Godfather™© how the manipulate the strings and control with impetuous Power behind the scenes. Then you have the legal book smart legal types like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Oprah, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, Warren buffet, the Shark Tank ™© Moguls.

Last you have the ancient mythical type like Cleopatra, King David, King Solomon, Mansa Musa and many more! They have all amassed enormous gorgeous fortunes well into the trillions!(all the types Fortune 500 mind's.)

People with Fortune 500 minds are geniuses and are useless the most wealthiest people on the planet cause they're planning execution and strategies are impeccable and second to none bar applause!

by Insurrection February 14, 2019

fortune teller

A con-man who TELLS you b**ls**t advice/predictions and charges a FORTUNE for said "divine rvelations"/

Harry Houdini had little patience or respect for so-called fortune tellers, and he was able to expose the vast majority of them as nothing but frauds and humbugs.

by QuacksO March 29, 2019

fortune cookie rule

When reading a fortune, add the words "in bed" to the end of the sentence. Hilarity ensues.

You will make friends with a new co-worker... in bed.

by Mr. Stabby March 16, 2005