coomer

Typical American newspeak designed to shame males. By it's own definition "only pleasure in life is ejaculating to porn several times a day" a female can't be a coomer. Lesbian and violent porn which are predominantly consumed by women, 50 Shades' international success and being the top customers at sexshops clearly don't count in the eyes of these soy-filled misandrists.

Npc3514: I support freedom!
Guy4793 (watches porn)
Npc3514: You degenerate coomer!

by r3tardslol January 19, 2020

Coomers Law

If you masturbate in an unlocked room, someone is bound to enter.

Person 1: I was masturbating in the office supply closet which no one EVER enters, but of course as soon as I started spanking it, my boss walked in.

Person 2: That's Coomers law. Shouldn't have challenged it.

by TheGodOfSpeechcraft December 6, 2019

Coomer Corner

The special corner in everyone's room where they go to coom.
Can also be a state of mind.

Wesley: Where's Namit?
Udai: He's probably in his coomer corner.

by zhewrong February 27, 2021

Butt Coomer

When you coom/cum in a girls anus then leave it their and let her clean it up

I’m such a butt coomer

by Moondog88 February 17, 2021

ok coomer

The phrase members of NoFap use when in an argument with a coomer

Coomer Steve: NoFap is a lie!! Masturbation has proven health benefits!

NoFap Chad: ok coomer

by mrliverpoolfan April 22, 2021

Mississippi Coomer

A Mississippi Coomer is when a married woman has sex with a Coomer who jacked off beforehand and he saves the cum and they use it for lube.

“Why would you cheat on Todd with your cousin Sandy?”

“Because he gives me one hell of a Mississippi Coomer.”

by Michael Brunswick November 30, 2019

Coomer-standoff

When two men compete to see who can go the longest without ejaculating or masturbating.

"I'm in a Coomer-standoff with my friend right now, I can't bang you babe."

by Brednuts November 1, 2021