Typical American newspeak designed to shame males. By it's own definition "only pleasure in life is ejaculating to porn several times a day" a female can't be a coomer. Lesbian and violent porn which are predominantly consumed by women, 50 Shades' international success and being the top customers at sexshops clearly don't count in the eyes of these soy-filled misandrists.
by r3tardslol January 19, 2020

Person 1: I was masturbating in the office supply closet which no one EVER enters, but of course as soon as I started spanking it, my boss walked in.
Person 2: That's Coomers law. Shouldn't have challenged it.
Person 2: That's Coomers law. Shouldn't have challenged it.
by TheGodOfSpeechcraft December 6, 2019

by zhewrong February 27, 2021

by Moondog88 February 17, 2021

by mrliverpoolfan April 22, 2021

A Mississippi Coomer is when a married woman has sex with a Coomer who jacked off beforehand and he saves the cum and they use it for lube.
“Why would you cheat on Todd with your cousin Sandy?”
“Because he gives me one hell of a Mississippi Coomer.”
“Because he gives me one hell of a Mississippi Coomer.”
by Michael Brunswick November 30, 2019

Phenomenon where a person has to be subject to Ignominy to make someone else look bad for knowing about NSFW content by name.
In my group chat the other day, my friend tried to make fun of me for knowing a porn actor's name in front of everyone but fell for the Coomer's Riposte.
"How do you know who Mia Khalifa is?"
"Wait, how do YOU know who that is?"
"How do you know who Mia Khalifa is?"
"Wait, how do YOU know who that is?"
by Hellen Keller Official December 30, 2022
