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cristinitis

when you are overcome by the sudden beautiful presence of cristin! it makes you hop up and down on one foot in excitement, and it also makes your blood pressure go so high that you will probably get a heart attack and die ;( so cristin is a murderer! :O so even if you <333 cristin stay away from her or else you will get CRISTINITIS!!!
My grandfather died from cristinitis when he saw cristin yesterday. ;(
by tory March 10, 2005
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Christianity

A religion based on the new testament section of the bible, containing the life and works of Jesus Christ. Main beliefs can be found in the prayers, Apostle's Creed and Nicene Creed. Some beliefs also based on Judaism and the Old Testament. Teaches that there is one singular God who if merciful and forgiving. Unadultered principles of teachings are kindness and forgiveness, basically to hate the sin and love the sinner. Has many sects and denominations.
Mother Teresa was and is a fine example of somebody who truly follows Christianity.
by 5463 June 30, 2004
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Christianity

A good excuse to write jokes on Urban Dictionary.
Hey, I'm someone who proclaims atheism and coexistence but can't stand Christianity at all. Let's go write a scathing satire of it on Urban Dictionary.
by Cynic551512341234 July 25, 2011
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Christianity

A pyramid scheme based on a philosophy that was fairly progressive 2000 years ago. It has been rendered obsolete by modern scientific understanding largely due to its inability to resolve its inconsistencies through intelligently-applied critical thinking. It now serves as a means of deterring social and political advancement and as a tax on the gullible.
The christian-controlled majority in congress voted to withdraw federal funds to help support financially disadvantaged infants, reminding the public that the babies will go to heaven.
by Who, me? August 16, 2003
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Christianity

A popular religion founded by a pacifist proto-socialist who promoted social justice, tolerance, and peace. Jesus Christ was a remarkably liberal man for his time, accepting prostitutes and murderers, among others, into his group. Unfortunately corrupted over the years, some branches of Christianity now seem to promote the opposite of the religion's founding aims, drawing on the works of St Paul, an evangelist who lived 50 years after the death of Jesus Christ. These sects of Christianity reverently follow Paul's interpretation, but refuse to accept any more modern interpretations of Christ's life.

Nevertheless, most mainstream Christians, (that is mainstream in the European sense, not the American sense) continue to try to fulfill the original aims of the religion. Please don't judge Christianity on a few mad sects in America and a old-fashioned German pope. Despite getting the most media coverage, they do not accurately represent Christianity and most Christians.
Archbishop Rowan Williams, Cardinal Hume and Mother Teresa are all people who try/tried to follow true Christianity.
by haardvark September 17, 2006
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Christianity

The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...
Yeah, Christianity makes perfect sense.
by a different nam3 October 1, 2007
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Christianity

A really cool religion, because if you follow it then you can go around raping, beating, and killing people, and as long as you confess your sins at the end of the day and repent you'll go to heaven!!!!!
I masturbate fifteen times a day, but I'm going to heaven because I tell God that I love him after I'm done!
by 5th column September 16, 2006
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