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stand-in alcoholic

When you can't attend/participate in (work) "functions" such as Happy Hour, client parties, the office holiday party, etc.
Melissa - "I'm too hung over to go to this wine tasting event tonight but the client expects someone from our office to be there."
Ann Marie - "Do you need me to be your stand-in alcoholic?"
Melissa - "WOULD YOU?! That would be such a big help."

Anna - "I already went to 3 parties this week! I can't go to anymore. I need to give my liver a rest. Do you want to be my stand-in alcoholic? There should be some cute guys there."
Ann Marie - "Sure!"
by AMarie0908 December 4, 2010
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High functioning alcoholic

An excuse term alcoholics use to justify their continued self-destruction.
Joe: "Wow, James is drinking and it's only 7 AM."
Mike: "He's a high functioning alcoholic. He says he needs it to function."
Joe: "So he's a severe alcoholic who needs help then."
by Super Thicc November 22, 2020
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Airport Alcoholic

Someone who is impossible of spending more than 5 minutes in an airport without getting drunk. Often, used as an coping mechanism for flying anxiety.
Friend 1: I freak out every time I fly.
Friend 2: How are you going to handle that flight to Amsterdam?
Friend 1: I’m an airport alcoholic.

Friend 1: There is was a thunderstorm, so all flights were delayed for 2 hours.
Friend 2: Oh, fuck.
Friend 1: Yeah, everyone just became an airport alcoholic like me.
by Journofist June 16, 2018
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Alcoholicnomics

A major with the course code of, learning how to drive and consume liquids simultaniously.not drinking and driving, but consuming and operating a car-like machine.
ex. 1
" Lindsay and Danielle have a Major in Alcoholicnomics."

ex.2

"Im major-ing in Alcoholicnomics in university. "
by didimoo June 16, 2009
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Sophisticated Alcoholic

noun.

A Sophisticated Alcoholic is someone who predominantly consumes high tier alcoholic beverages-cocktails. Occasionally, shooters fall under the repertoire of the Sophisticated Alcoholic.

There is a slight movement towards the sophistication of the Jazz Era, as evidenced by the influx of many Sophisticated Alcoholics.
"Jimmy is a Sophisticated Alcoholic. A Campari Orange will get you his affection."
by Turing May 3, 2004
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alcoholic

A person who knows exactly how many days it's been since they had a drink.
E.g., In January, 2007, Lindsay Lohan told People magazine "I haven't had a drink in seven days. Or anything." Lindsay Lohan's publicist Leslie Zelnick confirmed to The Associated Press in December that Lohan was attending Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.
by asking January 22, 2007
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alcoholic

A true Alcoholic would rather drink, then get a Blowjob.
Bills wife was getting ready to go down on him, but Bill said no, I'll take a double jack n coke instead.
by Recovering January 17, 2004
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