ERPM (Eye Rolls Per Minute) 

A unit used to measure the rate of bullshit escaping from one's mouth over a defined period of time.

My girlfriend's ERPM (Eye Rolls Per Minute) reached dangerous levels as I tried to make up excuses on why my trip to Vegas ended with me getting married to a stripper and getting a butterfly tattooed on my ass.

ERPM (Eye Rolls Per Minute) by tobmeister January 15, 2015

brown eye spinner 

Any person who sits on a penis and spins around easily due to a loose asshole.

wow I bet that trick is a brown eye spinner.

brown eye spinner by Baste Force February 4, 2015

Cream Eye 

Semen induced conjunctivitis, or pink eye, caused by explosive ejaculation into your partners eye

It had been so long since I came, my bucket load of semen hit her in the face and caused a cream eye, necessitating a visit to the eyewash station

Cream Eye by Eyeboy2015 March 7, 2015

husky eyes 

A person with two different colored eyes (e.g., one brown and one blue). It's called husky eyes because Siberian Husky dogs often have two different colored eyes.

David Bowie and Dan Aykroyd have husky eyes.

husky eyes by coldcoldcoldcoldcold May 9, 2015

Pirate-Eyed 

The condition of only being able to use one eye to obtain any kind of visual clarity, the other being shut. Can be brought on by excessive alcohol, opiate, or benzodiazepine use.

<drunk guy a> ugh god man i'm so pirate-eyed i ain't see shit, this whole place looks flat *trips over something*
<benzo'd guy a> i really would like to read this book but this is inconvenient
<opiate'd guy a> ..........

Pirate-Eyed by DavidTheRave June 23, 2015

straight eyed 

to not be cross eyed.

I'd rather have you straight eyed than cross eyed.

straight eyed by archerychick November 23, 2015

Scissor eyes 

When a trifling fool gives you a dirty look; A kin to side eye

If that girl doesn't stop giving me scissor eyes, I'm gonna walk over and slap them shut for her.

Scissor eyes by Idoesthedo January 26, 2016