utility wank

Masturbation, not initiated out of sexual arousal, but to achieve a goal, like relieving pressure or to become tired.

I couldn't sleep, so I utility wanked.

I wasn't even horny, it was just a utility wank so I could go to sleep.

by Germaggeddon January 9, 2013

wank up

Wank up is the art of wanking yourself awake first thing in the morning.

Dude I need to wank up before I get out of bed

by violet_ultra June 22, 2014

wank muse

object of desire during masturbation

Dude that Juju is such a wank muse I can go for hour just thinking about her.

by TheDirtyDozen December 1, 2010

Wank cannon

A person(s) who literally fires there seaman a large distance.
i.e. hitting your hair, shoulder or over your head and splatting it on every-day items.

Jack: Where did it go?
Sally: I can't find it!
Jack: Oh, its on the curtains.
Sally: Wow! You're a real wank cannon Jack.

by vValentine February 4, 2010

wank wallow

That feeling you get once you've finished a filthy wank. When you are lying in bed, jizz everywhere, and you can see a mans balls bouncing around your laptop screen. The lowest feeling of all.

had the biggest wank wallow this morning, everything was great until that moment just after i came. Grim

by seanysean23 January 30, 2015

Pan wanking

When cooking, you shake the pan backwards and forwards to stir or shake the contents without the use of a utensil.

Mostly done by chefs

"need a spoon?"
"no thanks, i'm happy pan wanking."

by Blue_devil February 28, 2009

armitage wanks

going for a wank in the toilet,

you were in there a long time, were you having an armitage wanks

by jaffaw July 16, 2009