Verb. When you defecate liquid poo so hard into a seated toilet so hard, the resulting splash covers both of your cheeks and sullies the back of your shirt. The experience is extremely unpleasant and aptly named after a notoriously unpleasant US Senator from Texas.
Bro, after eating one and a half chipotle burritos and chasing them down with four shots of espresso, I Ted Cruzed my girlfriend's toilet and had to throw away my favorite button down shirt.
by Softestalpaca June 14, 2022
Using Ben Gay as lube to thumb bang the ass of the girl you found out cheated on you instead of just dumping her.
They say revenge is best served cold. This revenge is icy.
They say revenge is best served cold. This revenge is icy.
Why is Jane walking funny?
I heard she got an Icy Ted because she fooled around on Hambone when he was away last week.
I heard she got an Icy Ted because she fooled around on Hambone when he was away last week.
by Hambone64 June 10, 2013
Used as a secret word for intercourse as to be used in public spaces without attracting any attention or ire.
Hey man, ted talk last night?
Yeah only a short one, snuck in a quick one after dinner.
Ah man, Ted talks after dinner are the best! *very obvious wink*
Yeah only a short one, snuck in a quick one after dinner.
Ah man, Ted talks after dinner are the best! *very obvious wink*
by Ted Talker May 30, 2023
by wigglewiggle January 19, 2012
by thewholetruth June 07, 2013
A sexual position where you ask your partner for consent, and they respond telling you how the Republican Party is being oppressed. You ask again, and they pull down their pants, take a shit on your face. Your partner, if male, proceeds to cut off part of their penis if it isn't already a micropenis, and rape you with their limp, bloody dick. When they ejaculate, they make sure to tell you "you can't abort that precious life it has rights" steals your money, jumps out the window and cuts NASA's budget by half while giving the big banks your money. Never should have had sex with a penguin man.
Wow, I can't believe what's happening to NASA's budget. It looks like they got the Ted Cruz treatment.
by EpicRealityCheck January 23, 2016
Correction: Father Ted was a British programme, made by Channel 4 (U.K.), and shot in London. It was, of course, set in Ireland and the external scenes were shot on location.
by anonymous June 02, 2004