Ass Napkin

Classy word for toilet paper

After a healthly bowl movement i daintily wiped my cornshoot with a genrous supply of ass napkins

by Monty Burns January 27, 2024

nature's napkins

the testicles of a male. Not female testicles. Those are ovaries.

Do not dispose of nature's napkins in the nearest trash receptacle.

The only napkins that do not need recyclin'.

"Cheetos powder? On my hands?"

"It's more likely than you think. Better use nature's napkins!"

by JimTheNickel July 3, 2009

Salting the Napkin

1. When you ejaculate in a girl and say you did not.

2. When you tell a girl you are wearing a condom, and are not, and then ejaculate into her.

Guy 1: I think Shannon is pregnant.

Guy 2: Really? Damn that sucks.

Guy 1: Nah, that's ok, I expected it. I keep salting the napkin.

by The saltier the better June 14, 2012

pick up your own napkin

Picking up your own napkin is when you can contort yourself in order to suck your own genitalia. This often involves having a couple of your ribs surgically removed. It refers to when you drop your napkin at the dinner table & have to bend over & get it without getting out of your chair

If you can't get a date just stay home & pick up your own napkin!
I decided to just stay home tonight and pick up my own napkin
My wife walked in and I was picking up my own napkin

by Neddy100 December 16, 2013

swing my napkin

a gay sex thingy

tonight billy will swing my napkin

by doodypants123 June 25, 2017

fold a napkin

Spreading large labia one at a time to each side.

Man I had to fold a napkin to get to the main course.

by Fastfrigate March 16, 2018

can i get a napkin

you're at lunch and choking on your food and you're asking for a napkin yet you sound like a demon and everyone is laughing at you instead

*eating nachos at lunch and starts choking* "can I get a napkin?"

by gayrights27 January 24, 2022