mattress parakeets

When somebody's mattress has bedsprings that are so worn and squeaky that they sound like parakeets.

I heard the mattress parakeets when I jumped on my bed (I was excited because I got a letter from my half-sister in Spain)...they sounded angry.

by RatchetBoo October 25, 2003

Mattress hockey

An imaginary activity touted by a bald 40-something year old to have made his melon void of hair.

Dude, "mattress hockey" lead to the loss of my hair though.

by cusefan001 February 21, 2013

mattress music

Music that people listen to while having sex.

This Chris Brown album is good but it's mostly mattress music.

by BobbyHerf March 28, 2016

Mattrossman

When your friend comes over and falls asleep sitting up on your couch and snores like a whore in church.

He came over and just did a whole mattrossman .

by Hot cherry pie37 October 17, 2018

mattress firm model

To describe someone who is in a deep, vegetative, inanimate, motionless like state. Similar to a coma or slumber after a long night of drinking alcoholic beverages with little H20 ratio. Typically used when someone gets knocked the fuck out.

On God, after we got out the bar he tried to press me and I made that dude a mattress firm model.

by kfcnutrients July 14, 2019

Mattress Toy

Someone you just have sex with. No plans of any thing else.

When using (Mattress Toy) the person is someone you have zero respect for, only serves as a means to get off. Most of the time a mattress toy is an ex. A mattress toy can be any gender.

When are you moving Melinda in?

Never bro, she's just a mattress toy.

I can't go to the party tonight, my mattress toy is in the mood.

by Whitehammer40 March 11, 2020

Mattress Back

The name you give a person who spends a lot of time on their back (on a mattress).

My sister is the Greater Southwestern Mattress Back

by Fagadactol March 14, 2020