jock

A term used by English people to insult a Scottishman.

I'm not going to that pub up in Glasgow, it's full of jocks!

Duh!

by Craig June 15, 2004

Jock Lock Wedgie

When you either:
Trip your victim over
Or
Find a victim conviniently on the floor already
And
You wegdie the back of their pants up hard and then force their legs up and attach the leg holes of the pants over their feet. This renders them unable to get free and the more they struggle, the tighter their wedgie gets.
This works better if you tie their hands up and if they are wearing tight jeans as they will hold the wedgie in more. Also, if performed on a female do a frontal wedgie too to add to their discomfort... and it's pure evil if they need the toilet beforehand as they will probably end up peeing themselves due to the increased pressure on their bladder!

I was lying on my bed on my stomach the other day in my skinny jeans, complaining to my older sister about how much I needed to go piss, but I couldn't be bothered. She laughed and suddenly jumped onto my back, giving me a jock lock wedgie and tugging up at the front a little too for effect. While I was struggling she tied my hands out in front of me and then left me. She came back ten minutes later and found me lying in a puddle of my own pee - I have never been so embarassed!

by AnomA100 July 20, 2008

turd jockey

One who participates in the act of anal intercourse and asshole play whether it be Homo or Hetero sexual play in nature.

"You know, I have just had about enough of Dave's comments about him and his wifes ass capades. Now when I see Dave, I just think to myself-man what a turd jockey and how he can eat with those hands or kiss his mother with that mouth. I Just want to say : Keep the tight wife but hole comments to yourself so I can be ignorant to your anal sexploritory adventures. I mean come on. We still have to spend christmas parties together and I don't want it to get freakin' wierder, so stop!-Please"

by R.L. Allen September 10, 2007

jock

The dick head who always shows up and ruins your game when you meet a hot chick

Me: ...Yea the operation was hard and I had a 5% chance of survival.
Hot Chick: Oh my god were you scared?!
Jock out of no where: What are you doing with this loser. Lets go for a ride (piece of shit rice burner) bitch.
Hot Chick: Uhh...OK!

by Gatman April 22, 2006

jocker

Old-fashioned prison slang for a dominant male homosexual "top," especially in his relationship with a submissive "bottom," aka punk.

.

Warden describing a prison killing: "Just two jockers fighting over a punk." IN COLD BLOOD, Truman Capote, 1966.

.

by al-in-chgo June 3, 2010

Quant Jock

One who is exceptionally skilled in quantitative analysis. More often than not using Microsoft Excel, Crystal Ball, SPSS, etc. Generally someone in the fixed income securities or option trading fields who makes twice as much money trading on their own than at their job.

and here in the smallest cubicle is LiWei, our resident Quant Jock.
LiWei say hi.
"=IF(OR(C$4$=0,C$4$=NA),"Hello my name is LiRizzle",Ctrl+Alt+Del)

by Old Man Hibbard December 14, 2008

jock

Jock. US slang for the thick-but-amiable types that always do well socially. No idea how, for most of them are arrogant bastards who think that the world would blow itself up in mourning if they were to die. Also, they tend to lie for each othe to keep their noses clean.

Ostracism by such admirable specimens resulted in Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold perpetrating the Columbine massacre of 1999. So, in an odd kind of way, they're partially responsible. But that's neither here nor there. Feminine: preppy.

by KHD June 11, 2003