A rapidly growing Suburb of St. Louis that at first seems like the perfect place to live on the surface. But truly it is the most artificial
Yuppie infested place in the entierty of the mid
west. The houses are little more than over expensive cubes of
plastic siding, and the schools are more like asylums for the culturly ill.
Paying tribute to it's mostly German heritage Columbia has instated a self importan
squad of gestapo like
Police, who for some reason can do anything they want with out a warrent. And instead of stopping what actual crimes do go on in this town they spend their
time harassing loiterers and skateboarders, or pretty much anyone under 25.
This town is supposed to be a safe, spottless community but people drive like the have their heads completly up there own
ass due to having cell phones surgically attached to their heads. Also there are many accounts of child molesters and the like and recently a youth minister ath the local Baptist church was charged with making child porn at a church
run summer
camp.
Everything here is subdivisions with fake lawns and perfect roads exept for a small
chunk of crap on the sothern
edge of town that the city officials have apearantly have forgotten and pay no attention to and have since let to deteriorate with out any attempt to fix streets.
There are almost no successful businesses in Columbia exept a dominos and an infinite amount of Real Estate agencies that exist to populate the endless rows of siding cubes. There is no sense of community of in Columbia. Everyone is either too stuck up or distrusting to talk or say hi and busily rush on past you on the sidewalks, or
try to run you over in their escalades (no joke). The worst thing about columbia is that they are constantly pwned by neighboring Waterloo.
You know all those bottles you always recycle? They
aren't used to make sweaters and sleeping
bags, they get melted down into Columbia Houses.
After WW II Gestapo officers, fearing for their lives, moved to Columbia,
Illinois and became police officers.
