The way men who are doomed to be virgins forever pleasure themselves. The best way to do it is to use the forehand technique. Trust me, I know. Seriously though, if you can reach an orgasm, you are a true man. SO go try it, do it in front of your mother, your father if you're gay. Which i'm not. So i never did it in front of my father. Trust me.
by Master Masturbate June 07, 2005
Something that Jesus watches you do. Especially when you are stuck in a porta-john and an angry tranny is banging on the door shouting "GO FASTER!"
As Bob stared at the midgets having sex on his computer monitor, he pulled out his pecker and masturbated. As he was in the middle of wankin' one out, he noticed it was dark outside and noticed a bluish light flash outside his window and heard a huge thunder. Suddenly, LIGHTNING STRUCK HIS HOUSE AND EVERYONE DIED!
And on that fine day, Jesus said the two words in a booming voice that humanity will forever cherish, "Don't masturbate."
And on that fine day, Jesus said the two words in a booming voice that humanity will forever cherish, "Don't masturbate."
by MrCat January 25, 2015
The act of blowing ones nose. Too much masturbation can cause chafing and not enough can cause build up of fluids.
"hand me a tissue, I need to masturbate" "I think I'm sick, I've been masturbating all day" "jimmy uses masturbation to clear his sinuses"
by Tranchinafy March 27, 2011
by Me.meme February 11, 2018
When a young child thinks he's a god for touching himself for pleasure while looking at their step-mom or step-sis
by Niggerfan69 May 07, 2019
by Your Ass September 27, 2003