pretentious jerk

a contemptibly obnoxious person who attempts to impress others by acting of greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than he/she is actually possesses.

I don't appreciate how much you are being a pretentious jerk at dinner with my family.

My boss is such a pretentious jerk!

by Matt01 February 5, 2019

cave jerk

when one masturbates with his/her arm under one leg whilst making caveman noises

*knock knock*
"What's all that strange grunting?"

"wtf?!? I'm cave jerking in here!"

by ohmschode January 12, 2009

jerking a turd

Jerk•ing•a•turd jerk-in-uh-turd

-adjective
1. Speculative term used to refer to someone's tardiness or absence.

2. late; absent; missing.

Question: "Where's the groom?"
Answer: "I don't know. He’s probably jerking a turd."

The ceremony starts at 3:00 PM sharp. You better be there - don’t be jerkin’ a turd.

by CongratulationsDave&Chrissy! August 29, 2010

jerk punch

signature move of naweed. punching som1 in a downward jerking motion making sure the knuckles hit first causing extreme pain and usually a dead arm, called the jerk punch because of the jerking off motion of the downward punch

OMFG naweed jerk punched me and i cant fucking feel my arm omg wtf

by weedsterandzach November 12, 2010

Hot jerk

Verb: After one returns from being outside in the cold, one then proceeds to run their hands under scalding hot water, and then begins to masturbate

Dude, after I shoveled the snow I rewarded myself with a hot jerk

by Zacharees73 February 10, 2015

Surf and jerk

A surf and jerk is when you get a handjob while eating seafood.

Hey remember Brenda from last night, well she gave the best surf and jerk ever .

by Teejay21 March 14, 2017

squat jerk

the act of squatting and jerking your meat simultaneously

i squat jerked for 20 minutes last week any my legs still hurt!

by tim jhonson December 2, 2018