douche-lobster

Essentially a gross insult. Usually reserved for that special fucktard in your life.

Dude...you are such a douche-lobster! I dont think you could count your balls and come up with the same number twice!

by snark2468 December 1, 2013

chair lobster

After long periods of sitting and readjustment a mans nuts will catch on the boxer seam and be squeezed like a grape.

You know when you sit down for a long period of time and readjust a couple different times before standing up completely. Well a chair lobster is that pinching feeling when your ballsack somehow gets weirdly stuck between a layer of boxers. When you stand up, the ballsack gets slightly pinched by a fold in the fabric.

From Reddit user /u/moparornocar

by BurningRambo December 18, 2013

taint lobster

a pubic crab that resides in the taint region, near the ass

Because John did not thoroughly shave his pubic area, his crabs relocated and are now considered taint lobsters.

Dude, I once gave a rim job to this chick who had some nasty ass taint lobsters.

by ScorpGem February 11, 2015

Spread Lobster

A sex position where the woman is up on her hands and legs with back facing the floor (similar to "crab walk")with spread legs while a man thrusts on his knees.

Hey baby, you wanna try some spread lobster tonight?

by GoobSnatch August 12, 2017

sticky lobster

When you cum in your hands and lobster walk around the room pinching people

Friend:walking around the room pinching people
Me:uh are you really being a sticky lobster right now

by RAWR XD Skert October 23, 2017

Full Lobster

When someone's fury reaches such a level that they turn red and begin to produce hot sweat. If male, will occasionally get a fat, sweaty boner as well.

Dude, stop calling Tommy a testicle-shitting rectal wart..

Yeah, seriously, stop! This nigga's about to go full lobster!

by FattyTuna May 30, 2018

Cock Lobster

And extremely sunburnt penis

I went to the nude beach yesterday and now I have a cock lobster

by Airboatgatorpark July 17, 2018