Child-Murdering Fuckwad

Mark Summer: I've just been informed that some people find the term "anti-vaxxer" to be offensive. From now on I will use the more technically accurate term of "Child-Murdering Fuckwad"

Bob: Oh look it's an "anti-vaxxer" mourning her dead children, and oh look the fathers signing the divorce sheats and the ghosts of the children are clapping on the father for trying to get over his retarded wife

Jim: Woah don't you know "anti-vaxxer" is offensive

Bob: Wot

Jim: The more accurate term is "Child-Murdering Fuckwad"

Retarded Anti Vaxxer Mom: A wot

Bob: I think she is having a stroke

Jim: I mean I don't care, at all

by Banana of hell January 13, 2019

Child Support

A sometimes elusive form of income that single mothers seek from their sperm partner. The amount paid out is usually determined by the sperm donor's income. If you are careless, and work a mediocre job, your paychecks will look terribly rediculous due to the obstraction of child support payments given to the mother through the welfare system. Child Support can rage from $50 a week per child if you are blue collar, up to $60,000 a month per child if you are an entertainer or a professional athlete.
However, lack of child support can easily land you in jail, and make your children's mother(s) very nasty and resentful.

Larry played professional basketball. His financial success gave him the instant Shaq Appeal. In a span of 12 months, he fathered 7 children by seven different women and had to pay $15,000 per month per child due to a judge's rulling.
Larry tore up his knee and lost his basketball career and endorsements. He now works at a car wash and takes home $87 dollars a week after taxes and child support payments.

by Mr. Dwayne October 18, 2004

Child porn

An act of doing bad touches to a minor involving with sexual favors with children as young as 3-9 years old usually older looking men prefer them because some cannot get laid with an adult female.

Child porn a person who enjoys seeing little children naked and has many sexual fantasy with the minor child porn.

~Sick bastard!

by l337f4agg0t May 18, 2010

Child-hold

To be limited in your actions and/or freedoms due to a child. A person experiencing child-hold may have their own child or be dating another individual who has a child that creates a burden which limits his or her freedoms.

Adam!! Are you coming out tonight or are you in the child-hold with the girlfriend again? >>Sorry man, the lady has the kid and we can't go anywhere.

by Frizzle06 April 11, 2010

child-dialed

Similar to pocket dialing or butt dialing, this is when a small child is playing with your cell phone and accidentally calls your phone book. Bonus points if said child calls your psycho ex who never got over you and your ex thinks you want them back.

Gee, Gabby, what are you playing with? Is that my phone? Did you CALL SOMEONE?!?! AAAAHHH, YOU CALLED JIM!! Hello, hello, Jim? No, I didn't call you. No, Gabby totally child-dialed your num... NO NO AHHHH!!!!

by Anni G October 12, 2010

Child please

1) To blow/brush off or disregard someone’s statement

1) Paula: Jesse looks really good nowadays

Jessica: CHILD PLEASE. He still living with his momma

by Galehart Popwell December 24, 2020

Child repellent

GET THE NEW CHILD REPELLENT!!!!!! THE PROTOTYPE IS DESIGNED AFTER PREVIOUS ATTEMPTS TO FUCK YOUR MOM. THE NEW 10MN IS PERFECT!!! WITH ONE PULL OF THE TRIGGER CHILDREN ARE BOUND TO BE GONE, NO MORE NEED FOR ABORTION

SHOOT THE CHILD WITH CHILD REPELLENT

-Adolf Hitler

by Zebulon720 September 26, 2023