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Crust Monkey

Someone who is incredibly crusty and gross. They need to take a shower ASAP and wash their clothes. Someone whose pubic hair and facial hair looks the same.
"Bro, he is such a crust monkey he has cum stains on his pants and the skin on his right hand is peeling off!"
by Giggggiiiggg March 16, 2017
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Lung Monkey

(n) A large, sticky glob of mucus.
Willis, recovering from a bad case of allergies, hawked a really gross lung monkey onto Gayle's fuzzy sweater.
by URallabunchofidiots June 30, 2018
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Eastern Monkey Spanking

The act of slipping your hand inside of her Asscrack and wobbling it all around until she takes a massive shit on your hand.
Jenna: Daddy Eastern Monkey Spank me!
Tom: Hold on Sommer Ray posted a booty pic!
Jenna: Fine all come to you

Tom: Eastern Monkey spank me first!
Jenna: You FAGWAG!
That is eastern Monkey spanking
by Meditation Papi March 14, 2019
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hug monkey

A love-addicted oddball monkey who will enthusiastically hug you until you can no longer get any air.
I felt the hug monkey squeezing me with all of its might... and then I realized it was going to kill me!
by Dr Bunnygirl May 23, 2020
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Penis Monkey

A mythical creature in the stories told around 2000 years ago about a legendary monkey that has god-like/omnipotent powers that will walk up to you in your dreams and steal your penis if you're a bad kid. Although it's just a tale that teaches kids to be good, this phenomena has shown up in many photos from the early 1860s to 1970s, only to disappear completely from every photo 69 hours later, after the picture was taken. Although having unlimited power would make you have every power imaginable and every power unimaginable, he only recorded powers are as follows:

-Teleportation
-The ability to make the skin of your penis roll up on itself and shred apart.
-Monky
-
-Ability to show himself in dreams.
-Ability to erase evidence of his existence.
-Immortality/Invincibility
Derek: Dude, what happened, why were you in the hospital?
James: T-the p-p-penis m-monkey got me.
Derek: Who? What are you talking about?
James: MY PENIS I-IT'S GONE!!
Derek: D: oh no
Tyrone: What happened?
Derek: Penis Monkey.
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uncircumcised monkey penis

A fabulous piece of machinery that is all natural and organic. It gets the name money because it has hair like a monkey's for comfort pleasure.
My friend has a nice uncircumcised monkey penis, it gave me and his girlfriend good pleasure at work yesterday.
by Mr.grittypants69 April 29, 2022
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Solid Gold Monkey

1. A monkey made of solid gold.

2. A production company "Solid Golden Monkey Productions"

3. A X-Box Live gamertag
"One day the Solid Gold Monkeys will attack us."
by Tim Butterworth January 25, 2008
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