Benjamin Johnson

Benjamin Johnson is an actual god. Do not argue or attempt to reason with Benjamin Johnsons- they will destroy you in 0.003 nanoseconds.

If you mess with a Benjamin Johnson, your sphincter will be blown out of your body and it will be throbbing on the floor.

by 3XsInHisName,2OnHisEyes March 8, 2019

Alfie Johnson

An Alfie Johnson is a breed of alien that invades earth once every 23 milliseconds to steal a Big Mac Burger from a starving African child.

The Alfie Johnson breed has become very rare and are almost extinct due to 12 Year old kids accidentally raping them thinking that they are, in fact, 3"1 BBW Dead Nan's. There are thought to be less than 10 left in existence.

Fuck You Man, Why are you acting like an Alfie Johnson.... I need that Burger to survive!

by Sergeant Gay-ming August 11, 2017

Fuckboy Johnson

This biggest douchebag on the face of the world.

Fuckboy Johnson: "Dude I can bench like 3543533532643634574574563454 pounds bro, fight me."

Bob: "Shut the hell up, Fuckboy Johnson."

by OneKillWonder September 18, 2016

puke johnson

Slapping style of bass playing associated with funk music.

I been diggin' on some Red Hot Chili Peppers lately. That little ugly dude in his drawers can get all over that puke johnson shit, man...

by exitflagger April 30, 2008

Marlton Johnson

A God among three other people. No one has as much swag as the engineer of destiny.

Dayum. Marlton Johnson is sassy.

by Hester shaw August 26, 2013

Cummy Johnson

After you pull out, you cum in your hand and slap her across the face.

I gave Rebecca that cummy Johnson last night.

by DonniesGrapes January 26, 2018

major johnson

A saucy grandad with a 12 inch schlongg, loves a cheeky saville inspired bum in the shower. Likes to drive minibuses with 20 kids in the back.
"How longs the journey sir?"

"12 inches"

Lectures on windage may result in a cheeky finger and a smirk to wake you up.
"How long's your barrel?"

Watch out, Major Johnsons about

by grevs February 10, 2017