Corporate Funky

A guideline for situational dress appropriateness, such as formal, semi-formal, or business casual. Corporate Funky is typically a combination of stylish, yet slightly edgy dress in a business situation, combined with scruffy facial hair.

"Gabe looks amazing in that bespoke suit with no tie. And not shaving for this dinner with the CEO is real edgy. He is soooo corporate funky"

by plenerg May 18, 2012

Corporate Multiple Personality Syndrome

When a person involved in a business organization holds multiple roles and genuinely begins to think that they themselves are different people by virtue of the roles. Often happens when a shareholder is a director who is also a director of an entity that is a shareholder. People with this syndrome can be caught emailing themselves with the to/from fields being populated by the different roles they hold. Victims of this syndrome often cite bizarre legal theories to substantiate spending time emailing themselves in official capacities.

from: [e-mail]
to: [e-mail]

Dear John A Smith, Shareholder:

Enclosed please find our latest annual report.

With Best Regards,

John A Smith (the same guy as the recipient)
CEO

Secretary or other clerk reading this exchange: "This guy has Corporate Multiple Personality Syndrome."

by Misanthropic Views October 9, 2013

Corporate Solution

is a euphemism for doing nothing but saying you will do something every week.

I appreciate you working on this but we need to have a corporate solution for this.

by Bill Wierzbowski September 23, 2014

Corporateson

Slang for a young worker in the corporate world. Often found unnecessarily stressing over emails, sucking up to higher-ups, and staying late at work to meet deadlines. Corporatesons usually de-stress through drinking, clubbing, and occasionally doing lines.

"Oh shit. Did Kevin become a corporateson?"
"Yeah. Didn't you see those new RM Williams he was rocking?"
"Aye true. I swear that's his third pair."

by Corporateson February 22, 2019

Corporatocracy

An amalgamation of Corporate and Bureaucracy. Meaning that even the most nimble startups eventually end up becoming corporacratic beasts. Where BS jobs are invented. Where there are more middle managers than individual contributors. Where buzzword bingo is the lingua franca.

1. Inventing ways to not pay people is the corporatocracy at work.
2. In a corporatocracy, having meetings for the sake of meetings is seen as 'work'
3. The BS created to get in the way of progress is how the corporatocracy justifies paying middle management.

by SIutMonkey February 7, 2021

corporate pig

a greedy person, generally an investor or a rich person. it usually hints that a person's greed is going to end up in a huge disaster.

"just shut up you corporate pig"

by Yaku sama March 1, 2022

Apparitional Corporate Leadership

Normally unseen leaders who make most of the major decisions in a dysfunctional corporation. These people appear based on what's in it for them but are completely clueless about ordinary work in the corporation. Like a Department of Apparitions on the top floors of a corporation.

I don't know, somebody up there in Apparitions. You know, the Department of Apparitional Corporate Leadership upstairs.

by chaptj August 5, 2010