Skip to main content

ramen

Ramen, as we know it, is an anemically Americanized version of a Japanese rip-off a Chinese gastronomical phenomenon known as lo mein. That means that, not only are the noodles pressed into a cake and dried, but both the noodles and the sauce are also purified of all useful nutrients. It amounts to strings of bleached flour steeped in warm brine.
OK, so we're convenience addicts, but we still don't have to settle for such flavorless, salty broth and mushy noodles.

Go to an oriental food store. Don't worry that that we look like guyjiin when we walk in. It can't be helped, so don't worry about it. Buy a few packages of Mi Bo.

Mi is a southeast Asian word, equivalent to the Chinese word mein, meaning "noodle". Bo is a southeast Asian word for moo, or cow, as if in English we said "moo" instead of borrowing the word "cow" from some other language to replace our word moo. Southeast Asians go ahead and say their word for cow when they talk about what they eat, instead of borrowing the word "beef" from yet another language to replace our word cow. How sensible of them.

So you go into the oriental food store and buys some packages of cow-flavored noodles. The packages look just like ramen noodle packages, so make sure you don't buy any Americanized brands like Smack or Top. Mama and Kung Fu are good brands.

If you don't recognize any brands, check by feel, what the flavor packet is like. Good flavor packets in truly oriental "ramen" packages will feel thicker and softer because they contain two or three different kinds of seasonings: A regular flavor packet, a flavored oil packet and possibly, a spice packet.

Dump the flavoring packets into half as much water as you're used to using for ramen while it's heating so you have a nice broth that will cook flavor into the noodles when you add them. Do some taste-testing while gradually adding the spice, so you don't find the final result toxic to your taste buds. Don't add the noodles until the water boils. Keep it boiling until the noodles are done.

If you want to be authentic, don't break the noodles. Some parts of Asia use chopsticks and some don't, so that's optional.

If you prefer convenience, break the noodles small enough to fit in your soup spoon.

Lift the noodles out of the broth and place them into a bowl and garnish it generously with bean sprouts, snow peas, and/or chopped onion to suit your taste. Then pour the boiling broth over it all.

When you're ready for another adventure, go back and buy some other flavor.
by Downstrike April 14, 2006
mugGet the ramen mug.

ramen nachos

Nachos made with Ramen noodles instead of tortilla chips. Invented by Jason Graham Fox. Also known as the German Nacho.
Excuse me, do your Ramen Nachos contain MSG?
by JasonBox August 18, 2011
mugGet the ramen nachos mug.
Related Words
rameh Ramen Ramen Noodles rame Ramel Rameen ramah racehorse Rameez ramell

Ramen

Pronounced with accent on 2nd syllable.

Used as a substitute for "amen" by those who wish to avoid religious expressions.
"Religulous" is the best movie of 2008.

Ramen, brother, ramen.
by UrbanElvis January 2, 2009
mugGet the Ramen mug.

The Ramen Noodle

When you are lieing on your stomach with your pants pulled down and your penis between your legs. While the girl lies behind you giving you a blowjob with a finger in your butt.
Originated in Waterloo Ontario from a student at Laurier University.
Yo last night my girl gave me the best Ramen Noodle.
Did you hear about Michael last night getting the Ramen Noodle.
by JLZ96 April 4, 2017
mugGet the The Ramen Noodle mug.

Camp Ramah in the Berkshires

Camp Ramah in the Berkshires is a Jewish sleepaway camp located in Wingdale, New York. Many japs and spoiled rich Jews come to this camp. They like to be obnoxious and make fun of rival camp, Palmer, also known as Camp Ramah New England. The camp is split into two sides, A-Side and B-Side. All of the annoying A-Side kids who are going to B-Side the following year chant "B-Side Next Year" all summer long.
Bruh, have you been to Camp Ramah in the Berkshires?

Camp Ramah in the Berkshires is lit!
by youngsavage69 November 3, 2018
mugGet the Camp Ramah in the Berkshires mug.

Rameen

Do you see that Rameen?
by Master At Words December 6, 2019
mugGet the Rameen mug.

ramen metros

college-educated but still lower income earning urbanites. ramen of course refers to Ramen noodles that people of this type are likely to still be buying.
This bar is all Ramen metros, mayn. Let's roll.
by Ashley8484 January 8, 2009
mugGet the ramen metros mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email