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And I still don't give a single absolute fuck about historical slavery or child murder.
Hym "Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved now going to be the impetus for child murder. They should have told you to go fuck yourself so I'm going to go ahead and do it for them. Go fuck yourself!"
by Hym Iam July 5, 2025
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What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to perianal abscesses.
Person 1: Are you addicted to perianal abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: My father and mother only beat me with materials and objects, you are lucky you that you get the empty hands: The First Juvenile Release
by Theusurpedmammarygland February 4, 2025
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Fuck me gently with a chainsaw

Popularized by the movie, "The Heathers", this phrase is said in response to a request one deems impossible or absurd (much like being gently fucked with a chainsaw). It's basically a way of showing someone how ridiculous what they've just asked sounds.

Ex.
Veronica: “Why can’t we talk to other kinds of people?”
Heather Chandler: “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa?”
Dylan: "Hey Nick can I borrow your car once its out of the shop?"
"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. You crashed it just last week!"
by Cotbumm July 21, 2016
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fuck me sideways with a chainsaw

referring to someone who is really screwed. just a bigger emphasis on how fucked they are.

this is far from a good thing, if you couldn't tell by the name.
mother; "we're going to visit your grandparents tomorrow! yay!"
daughter; "fuck me sideways with a chainsaw."
by josie minus the pussycats June 29, 2011
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fuck me gently with a chainsaw

First used (?) in "Heathers" http://imdb.com/title/tt0097493/ , probably more close to meaning "well, I'll be damned" or "Well, kiss my ass".
Heather Chandler: Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Theresa?
by OldFart77 December 9, 2008
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make me one with everything

The above user is wrong, or is quoting some lame malapropism of the original joke.

"Make me one with everything" is the response given by a Buddhist to a hot dog vendor who asks him, "What can I make you?".

The joke is a play on words, as the oft-quoted Buddhist "motto" is to "be at one" or "be at peace" with everything natural in the world.
A Buddhist goes to a hot dog vendor and the vendor asks him "Hey buddy what can I make ya?".

"Make me one with everything" replies the Buddhist.
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Fuck me sideways with a lunchbox

Used to describe a situation where you are underappreciated. Not given the credit you deserve.

In shock due to utter disrespect.
" man you didnt do to well that time"
"Well fuck me sideways with a lunchbox, i made it to the last level man."

"Finally, I would like to comment on an unlikely topic, my pass coverage ratings. I see that I am a better at man-to-man coverage (31) than zone (21). Fuck me sideways with a lunchbox. Where did these scores even come from?" -- Ethan Albright to John Madden regarding him beong the lowest rated player in madden.
by kws53 May 13, 2011
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