Offside Merchant. Joined Real Madrid only to ruin the team by interrupting his teammates. Complains when his teammates don't feed him easy tap-ins. Get's owned by offside traps and ghosted his first El Clasico
Dumbass Turtle Fan: "Ummm, Mbappe owns Varca"🤓🤓🤓🤓
Normal person: "LMFAOOOO, Kylian Offsidebappe lost El Clasico and got caught offside everytime"
Normal person: "LMFAOOOO, Kylian Offsidebappe lost El Clasico and got caught offside everytime"
by PenaldoPessiDog November 9, 2024
Get the Kylian Offsidebappe mug.Carbon offsetting is one thing with that headaches of jetlag. However, since last night I've gotten to deal with bourbon offsetting which is a lot more horrible!
by 🅰️ December 5, 2025
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• Obfusticate
This theory recognizes that humans are not perfect and that for every mistake in a model or schedule
there will be another "mistake" in somewhat equal scope to offset each other, hence rendering the model or budget still valid.
The idea behind is that things will anyway fall the way they fall and we cannot control for that.
The optimistic view is that this theory rejects Murphy's Law, the negligent take on it is the "Trust me, it will be OK" approach to life.
Decide where you want to be.
there will be another "mistake" in somewhat equal scope to offset each other, hence rendering the model or budget still valid.
The idea behind is that things will anyway fall the way they fall and we cannot control for that.
The optimistic view is that this theory rejects Murphy's Law, the negligent take on it is the "Trust me, it will be OK" approach to life.
Decide where you want to be.
Accountant 1: oh, crap... we forgot to add $1 million in income from product X sales to the budget
Accountant 2: oh, fudge... product Y's revenue is inflated by $980K...oh wait... based on the Theory of Offsetting Mistakes all is well, the numbers we gave the CEO are still valid, yay.
Girl: oh, crap... your condom broke
Dude: oh, fudge... you miscounted your days, your period is due today at 8pm.... you are not pregnant, yay.
Accountant 2: oh, fudge... product Y's revenue is inflated by $980K...oh wait... based on the Theory of Offsetting Mistakes all is well, the numbers we gave the CEO are still valid, yay.
Girl: oh, crap... your condom broke
Dude: oh, fudge... you miscounted your days, your period is due today at 8pm.... you are not pregnant, yay.
by Tim E Wastin August 26, 2013
Get the Theory of Offsetting Mistakes mug.by 123ilikecheesetigers October 22, 2023
Get the gender neutral offspring mug.Hym Iam "And the collusion with the YouTube freaks (likely in exchange for legal protection and to avoid getting roped into this) to protract and obfuscate just goes to show how far they are willing to go to hide the truth. And no, Cody Johnston. I do not need to argue for why me specifically should not have to be stalked and harassed indefinitely. I'm not meeting a burden of proof that you have already met for me. And I'm not taking any of the blame for any of the reactions you received to you doing this to other people. Stop letting them stall. Stop letting the split the baby. I don't have to care about anything and I don't have to be properly motivated. You are all being insanely childish and the othe people didn't indulge you as long as I have, that's for sure."
by Hym Iam March 10, 2026
Get the Protract and obfuscate mug.You fucks though I "just wanted attention" and when I said I DIDN'T WANT THAT and laid out my case you fucking ignored me. We were all here before Hym. You listen to the wrong people and I shouldn't have to pay the price for it. Someone told you to do what you did in response to this and I told you to make a video.
Hym "I didn't give you fucking hints and make you figure it out. It started with 'It could be either or' and then I laid out my case for why it seemed to not be a manifestation of my own mind. Tested to see if the references to the things I wrote related to a failure on my part to adequately obfuscate my identity which lead me to change my name several times and also is peripheral to the fact the the retard doing the referencing didn't have a phone. And then Jordan Peterson did it on of his podcasts and then and again when he told me to leave. NOT AN ISOLATED INSTANCE JORDAN. LIKE THE STD BASED HORROR MOVIE, IT FOLLOWS.
Hym "I didn't give you fucking hints and make you figure it out. It started with 'It could be either or' and then I laid out my case for why it seemed to not be a manifestation of my own mind. Tested to see if the references to the things I wrote related to a failure on my part to adequately obfuscate my identity which lead me to change my name several times and also is peripheral to the fact the the retard doing the referencing didn't have a phone. And then Jordan Peterson did it on of his podcasts and then and again when he told me to leave. NOT AN ISOLATED INSTANCE JORDAN. LIKE THE STD BASED HORROR MOVIE, IT FOLLOWS.
Not a real option or a good one. That's when I wrote the 'You're so right! I was half-assing it! This was a half-measure' I explained after I changed the name to Hym that I was the previous guy talking about weaponized schizophrenia and now I don't know what the fuck you did but it only resembles what I did in the way that a horse painted black and white would resemble a zebra. This has been pretty fucking drawn out and if you were reading the whole thing what the fuck did you think was happening here? Well Todd Phillips stole my line and then in the interview about the movie I co-wrote and for which I didn't get paid, HE DID THE REFERENCE THING TOO. IN THE FUCKING INTERVIEW! And where was he when the kids got shot? Where was Todd Phillips when the kids got murdered from the weaponized schizophrenia? I haven't seen him on camera since. So you WEREN'T TOO CONFUSED! You stole my shit, you did it yourselves, and then you blame me after knowingly doing the thing both to me and after stealing my shit. So fuck you for trying to say 'I made it to fucking confusing for you.' Fuck! So no I didn't obfuscate it too much."
by Hym Iam December 9, 2025
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