splenda

An adjective describing something that is so freakin sweet it can only be described as "sweeter than sweet".

Pedro, that jump was splenda.

by TeeI October 23, 2005

SPLENDA

A non-addictive version of the drug known as cocaine which was made from cocaine and through scientific measure was remedied of all its bad side effects like "the drip", "a bad taste", and has no "come down" after the high effect wears off in usually an hour per dose. Nicknamed "the Perfect Drug" in 3042 A.D. because scientists could find no harmful effects to humans. Renegade pirate time travelers thought it a brilliant idea to smuggle the drug back in time to 1998 A.D. and market it as an artificial sweetener, since it also had no calories and could sweeten anything, leaving it readily available and cheap to fellow time travelers who knew enough to sniff it rather than eat it to get the high.

"How do you know Skrillex is from the future?"

"Because I saw him snorting lines of Splenda... and have you heard his music?"

by Fairy Godmutha March 1, 2017

Splenda

A white chick

Yo, that Splenda is hella fineeeeee

by Splenda Slayer April 4, 2019

splenda papa

A man who wants to be a sugar daddy but is most definitely past his prime, cheep as hell, lies about being great in bed, and looks like your recently deceased grandfather.

Woooow, bill is a sugar daddy?

Nope, he's a Splenda papa. Too old and cheep to be supplying sugar.

by Roryroryrorai12345717 March 21, 2016

Splenda Daddy

A term coined by Cindy B. Gilbert to describe a broke man attempting to be a sugar daddy.

(Other artificial sweetener brands suffice as well for this term.)

Jessica: Hey did you here about that gold digger dude Michael's dating?
Cindy: Ha, Michael having a bae.. funny...but seriously bro, no worries there, Michael is such a Splenda Daddy.
Jessica: Whaddya' mean?
Cindy: Everyone knows Michael's broke af.

by Redheadedamericangirl December 19, 2015

Splenda Baby

Looks like sugar, tastes like sugar, but is "sugar" free.

Takes gifts and money and gives little or nothing in return.

Bought that bitch a Gucci purse and a pony and didn't even get a goodnight kiss. What a damn Splenda Baby!

by m2dirty September 13, 2011

Splenda Daddy

A daddy (straight or gay older male with father like attributes and/or likes to sleep with younger individuals) that claims to provide financial support for love and attention, however does not meet the financial prerequisites to provide substantial sugar

My sugar daddy lost his job, thank god for his savings account so at least he can be Splenda daddy for now

by RobbSchu December 19, 2018