retirement plan

A large caliber handgun kept by one who does not want to get old, so that he won't have to.

"What the Hell are you doing with a .50 Desert Eagle that you've never used?"

"That's just my retirement plan."

by [e-mail] March 7, 2009

liberal education requirement

A class required by the higher education system. It assists no one in the completion of any type of degree. The knowledge is forgotten once the class is complete and the money you spent on it is wasted because the class benifits no one at all.

College Student 1: "Hey man what liberal education requirement class are you taking?"

College Student 2: "I'm taking a chemistry lab because when I get my accounting degree I'll have to mix chemicals....a lot."

College Student 1: "I would rather just throw the money into my toilet and flush it down then take these ridiculous classes."

by T. Tom December 18, 2007

system requirements

The minimum level of hardware and software that must be present before a piece of hardware or software will work properly.

Halo PC

Windows 98SE or higher
733MHZ Processor
1.2 GB Hard Drive space
32MB Videocard
8x CD-ROM
Sound Card
Speakers

by Primal February 6, 2004

retirement home

The deathbed of old people. They check in, they never check out. Before they finally draw their last breath, they are required to live a life of incredible dullness, due to health complications of old folks.

"I'm 60 years old, nothing to do here but to play checkers and eat old corn cobblers, because ham hurts my teeth and bread clogs my arteries."

Heartbeat monitor goes dead...

"Oh dang..."

by Chang Tan December 29, 2004

Presidential IQ requirement

A strongly needed requirement that would formally require a US Presidential candidate to have an IQ of at least 85.

Clearly the Presidential IQ requirement would keep the Moron in Chief from being re-elected.

by Dr Bunnygirl November 20, 2019

Crewing Requirements

Means your flight isnt going to be leaving in the near future. Chances are the airline crew for your flight arent even in the same city, and wont be untill well after your flight was supposed to land. Usually announced after a "late inbound aircraft" delay and before "engineering requirements" cancellation.

Delta Flight 1182 has been further delayed due to "Crewing Requirements"

by flyingspikes April 30, 2009

Redneck Retirement Plan

Regularly socking away money, not into any kind of savings plan, but into lottery tickets.

Alternately, into any kind of gambling.

Hopefully my Redneck Retirement Plan will pay off this week.

by high-tech redneck August 25, 2009