Pokemon paranoia

The suspicion that anyone on their phone outdoors is playing PoGo.

"Hey, you playing Pokemon?"
"Not me..."
--Pokemon paranoia claims another victim

by markhenry64 July 14, 2016

STD Paranoia

After having sex with someone for the first time, the inevitable thought that you may possibly have just received some strange STD, even if safe sex was practiced.

STD Paranoia can also lead to the misinterpretation of something harmless as symptoms of an STD.

John: "Remember that girl i told you I hooked up with about a week ago? I think she gave me an STD, I have this patch of red skin on my dick!"
Craig: "Sounds like a classic case of STD Paranoia bro, don't worry, it happens to everyone. Just put some moisturizer on that shit and you're golden."

by 132299 April 16, 2009

paranoia

No chance I'm gonna give a definition.. What if someone's watching? :o

/me dons ninja mask

I must be paranoid, I keep looking over my back for th.. AAAAHHHH!!!!!!

by EmSixTeen August 7, 2004

Facebook Paranoia

Facebook Paranoia - Noun. - unfounded or ill-founded fear of (1) unauthorized editing of one's Facebook (FB) account characterized by unflattering profile pics or socially deplorable interests by hackers or prankster friends; (2) misinterpretation of FB communication due to lack of voice inflection, especially in private messaging; (3) seizure and hoarding of drunken/out-of-context photos by others for future blackmail; (4) being caught in a lie when your off-FB conversations are countered by another's cognizance of your FB information; (5) unintentionally revealing oneself as a stalker by acknowleging awareness of another's interests or recent activities only noted on FB, especially when involving a crush/casual hook-up;

Facebook paranoia situation 4 - John to friend while at gym: "Sorry I couldn't watch the game with you guys last night, I was putting nitro in the Mustang." Friend: "Dude, don't lie, I totally saw your girl's wall post to her friend that you were watching The Notebook last night with her and that you cried during the love-making scene."

Facebook paranoia situation 5 - Girl: "My friend and I were talking about going to a movie later this week, if you don't have to work maybe you can join us?" Boy: "Oh yeah, I've been wanting to see Zoolander too and I don't have to work Thursday!!" Girl: "Um....how'd you know.....?"

by Jeannette2 May 28, 2008

parkanoia

That dread you feel when you can't find where you parked your car and you realize it may have been stolen (usually occuring soon before you find your car, but not so soon that those moments of pulse-quickening worry, which seem stretched to infinite length, haven't done their damage to your nerves and shortened your lifespan by about an hour).

What the--? I left it right here. Didn't I? Sure, I did, 'cuz it was near the...oh, wait, is that where I went in? It looks just like... Hell, they all look like--well, I'll check the upper level and, uh, no, not there. I'm sure I parked it right over by the--oh, no, now I know! It's the lower level. Yeah, 'cuz I had to take the stairs, and...um...wait, that's not right either. What the hell?! Oh, my god... Omigod, omigod, omigod, my car has been STOLEN! It's finally happened to me!! Why does everything have to happen to me!!! Jesu--oh, there it is. Whew. Heh. Ha, ha! Parkanoia!

by Phraser July 26, 2009

Composer's Paranoia

The feeling one may get when composing a piece. It occurs when the composer, per se, feels as if their piece has already been written and is just coming from the back of their brain.

John: "Hey, Jeannette! What are you doing?"
Jeanette: "Ah, I'm composing a cello piece!"
John: "Cool, can I hear?"
Jeanette: "No, not yet. I'm afraid I have composer's paranoia! It would be embarrassing if you already knew the piece."

by composersparanoia November 14, 2022

paranoia

Believing that everyone is out to get you.

Although it is true that everyone IS out to get you, such as the government and stalkers.

by AYB April 1, 2003