mallet fingers

Mallet fingers, i.e. when a boy is really bad at fingering a girl, so bad it is painful. Possibly big fingers, or just bad practice.

Jane: Did you have fun with Raymond last night.
Cat: Yeah i heard you went back with him!?
Lucy: Yeah wish i hadnt though, he had real mallet fingers!
Jane: ooh ouch!

mallet fingers by CrackwhoMoFo June 13, 2009

Mallet face 

Definition: A person who has a very flat or indented face

Boy: “Oi Charlie I swear you sit next to mallet face”
Charlie: “yeah bro its a pain in the ass”

Mallet face by Studentwatchesporn December 10, 2021

fish mallet 

Derogatory Term name or describtion for a penis.

Hey buddy what are you doing tonite
Im broke I think im gonna stay home and play with my fish mallet tonite.

fish mallet by [e-mail] October 28, 2007

Gutter Mallet

Gutter: Repulsive, Nasty and Embarrassing
Mallet: Destroys, Demolishes and Crushes

Bitty brought out the Gutter Mallet

Gutter Mallet by Bittyrock August 20, 2012

Moisty's Mallet 

Word Association Game, Which each player must say a related word to one that was previously just said. The person who pauses or cant think of a word gets a bash around the head, often with a heavey object eg. a book.

The Game, Moisty's Mallet

EG.

Jack:'Football'
John:'Sport'
Jack:'Basket Ball'
John:'Net'
Jack:'Internet'
John:'Porn'

Moisty's Mallet by Cammers November 3, 2008

Ass Mallet 

Variation of "Asshammer". Somebody who exists purely to pound on ass (see "malletize"). Usually a gay man or somebody who is suspected of being gay.

Noah: I think Garrett likes the cock.
Chris: What an ass mallet!

Ass Mallet by C2Y August 6, 2005

Face like a rat catchers mallet 

A specimen so damn ugly they resemble the business end of a mallet

yeah but she got a face like a rat catchers mallet!

Face like a rat catchers mallet by Scriney93 November 8, 2010