Lance Armstrong 

To sum it all up, an American Hero. When it took the entire nation of Nazi Germany to conquer France in a month, he can do it in a couple of weeks with the help of a few friends. He's like the Achilles of modern times. Only this man has no weakness. He'll kick all yo' asses.

-Hey I heard Lance won the tour for the 7th time in a row.
-Yeah, that guy's a freakin' tank.

Lance Armstrong by Paultheman August 20, 2005

lance armstrong 

lance armstrong's genes hold the secret to curing cancer. He can sweat out cancer and crap out tumors. Every exwife of Lance Armstrong has cancer because he can actually will it into people's system. The friction from Lance's bike powers Zeus's lightning bolts. No matter where you are and no matter where lance is he will beat you in a race to anywhere.

Lance Armstrong ejected cancer from his body so forcibly that a testicle shot off.

lance armstrong by RocktheJordan August 16, 2006

lance armstrong 

When playing pong and only having one ball because all others were lost, too dirty, or crushed in the process of beer pong.

bob: yo man wheres the other ball?
todd: dunno man, guess we're gonna have to lance armstrong it
bob: goddamnit

lance armstrong by fattehboi November 2, 2008

lance armstrong 

Sexual phenomenon in which the female kicks her legs during intercourse, i.e. as the pedals of a bicycle turn.

She was so turned on she went lance armstrong on me after just five minutes.

lance armstrong by ozMo January 12, 2007

Lance Armstrong 

The greatest cyclist that we have seen for a long time. Triathlete-turned cycling legend, was diagnosed with advanced testicular cancer at the age of 25, was only given a 40-50% chance to live, survived, and went on to win a record 7 Tours de France. He is now retired, but is still very much invovled in the cycling and cancer communities, and has his own foundation, the Lance Armstrong Foundation. He started the Livestrong wristbands and also has a Livestrong clothing line and a 10/2 clothing line (10/2=October 2, the day Lance was diagnosed) and a US dollar from each product sold goes to the LAF. An amazing human being, and we won't see someone like him for a long time to come.

Lance Armstrong is an eight year cancer survivor!

Lance Armstrong by LanceIsMyHero December 26, 2005

lance armstrong 

the american who rides bicycles better than the french.

Lance Armstrong rapes all europeans when it comes to bike racing. Other americans are just so fat, they had no chance of competing with him to begin.

lance armstrong by Nicolas Sarkozy September 30, 2007

Lance Armstrong 

A man who overcame testicular cancer and has won the Tour de France numerous times. He also has his own line of yellow wristbands that are nothing short of sweet.

Lance Armstrong will do more than you ever will and he has only one nut.
Imagine if he had two....

Lance Armstrong by Ryan Agee May 24, 2007