Jovian

A term for a man who is only attracted to other men. The term originated from the name Bon Jovi, most notably known for being a jovian. Penned by Mathias and Ryland Magoo.

Ryland: I’m a jovial jovian!
Mathias: We could go down in queer history!

by Meghed April 29, 2024

Jovian Sunspot

A drink from the television series Babylon 5.
It originated from the Zeus bar on the Io Transfer Station. Served in a cocktail glass, the ingredients are added in the following order:

-Ice
-1/4 cup Cream of Coconut
-3 tbsp Bottled Cranberry-Apple Juice
-2 tbsp Vodka
-2 tbsp Orange Juice

I doubt this tastes good.

mmm.... a Jovian Sunspot

by AndreasE September 26, 2005

Jovian Duck

A metaphor for something recognizable but which cannot possibly be that thing. Implies that you should be careful of the thing, precisely because it cannot be what you recognize it to be.

If, however, you are encountering something that quacks like a duck and looks like a duck and craps like a duck swirling around Jupiter’s Great Red Spot, the one thing you should definitely conclude is that you’re not dealing with a duck. In fact, you should probably back away slowly and keep your distance until you figure out what you are dealing with, because there’s no f*cking way a duck could have evolved in the Jovian atmosphere. You are encountering a Jovian Duck. gently edited from Peter Watts

by undefining orthodoxy June 21, 2022

Jovian Split

A predictive algorithmic structure used to determine the probable outcomes of ranked online video game matches by analyzing complex, non-linear sequences in historical match data. The Jovian Split identifies statistically significant clusters in performance trends such as, team skill composition, recurring causes of defeat, opponent behavioral variance, time-of-day performance shifts, and geographically-induced server-side team configuration mismatches. It relies on stochastic modeling and probabilistic inference to surface outcome patterns that repeat under specific conditions with exceptional predictive power.

In practical terms, a Jovian Split may refer to a sharply defined trajectory of outcomes, such as a 2-win, 6-loss, 9-win, 1-loss, 90-win sequence emerging predictably when key factors align. While not deterministic, the system operates with greater accuracy than standard ranking metrics like ELO or MMR. It is used to forecast competitive outcomes, identify matchmaking anomalies, and model the influence of hidden variables on win probabilities.

"The team’s sudden 5-win, 7-loss, 10-win streak isn’t random — it’s a classic Jovian Split forming, triggered by roster consistency and repeated exposure to the same match pool."

The term originates from Jovian of Ephesus, an 8th-century proto-statistician and philosopher known for applying early probabilistic reasoning to public contests and athletic games. Through obsessive documentation of variables ranging from competitor lineage to environmental disturbances and officiating inconsistencies, Jovian developed an early framework for prediction that laid dormant for centuries. His approach was revived and adapted to digital competition in the modern era, where the same principles now govern the understanding of match outcome dynamics, known collectively as the Jovian Split.

by xr100rr July 8, 2025

Jovian Waterwheel

The act of Flicker Gooning underwater/in space, where ones own ejaculation causes the gooner to be propelled. Named after the fact that because of the penis' position relative to the gooners center of mass, the gooner will start uncontrollably spinning. Due to the low gravity and drag nature of the environment, the spinning motion often results in the rotation of body into your own seed. Trained Flicker Gooners have used this technique to trap air bubbles while in the deep, letting them naturally spin into and consume their own jizz air and prolonging their staying-power.

Jerma: Isn't it dangerous for someone to stay out in the europan waters for so long without an air tank?

Lukas: Nah, thats our trained flicker gooner Pano, he's using the Jovian Waterwheel technique to trap air so he can breath for much longer.

by The Real Flicker Gooner March 31, 2026

ya.favkiddo_jovian

ya.favkiddo_jovian is a boy that used to have 14k followers on tiktok he was very well known but then tiktok banned him so now he goes by “iiamjovian he’s also 14

ya.favkiddo_jovian is so wellknown

by ya.favkiddo_jovian fan May 9, 2021

Jovanna

If you know a girl name Jovanna,you know the baddest bitch their is! She may seem quite at first, but once you get to know her she is as loud as it gets. She is hella hot . She is mad nice. She is caring and loyal. When she says something she means it. When she likes a guy she really likes him. She is as cute as it gets. People always tells her things but she will never tell anybody what she knows. She is smart in some subjects. She is one of the best people you will ever meet.

Jovanna is a Italian name. Most people pronounce it wrong, but it’s a beautiful uncommon name. A Jovanna will always be hot and will always be a guy magnet.

Many guys will fall for a Jovanna rather they like it or not. If you know a Jovanna you better keep her cause if you don’t She will love on. There are many people who would love to be her friend.

This is only true if she was born on any dates from October 23-December 11. If she wasn’t born on one of those dates it may or may not be true

Jovanna is looking fine like always

Jovanna is hot

Jovanna is cute

I want to become friends with Jovanna

Is Jovanna single or taken

by Kaitlyn Salerno October 29, 2019