castrate

to get your balls cut off

my girlfriend castrated me when she found out i was cheating on her.

by 69 December 23, 2004

masterbate

how dumb people spell "masturbate"

i gotsta ta go masterbate rihgt no!

by meh July 1, 2003

crasturbate

to masturbate and cry at the same time. Usually performed by male graduate students in the sciences or engineering. Common causes include: no women around, ugliness, poverty, stress, being dumped, etc.

last night I thought of <name> so I crasturbated

by Bob Carlyle October 31, 2005

Castrate Yourself

Something that is said to a dude who has said or done something so inexplicably stupid that his gametes need to be immediately removed from the gene pool.

Ryan: Yeah, I thought it best to get back together with her again.
Josh: Isn't this the fourth time?
Ryan: Well, yeah.
Josh: Fucking castrate yourself.

by AbsolutelyPolishedBean May 18, 2016

Masterbate

Masturbation for professionals.

"You spelled masturbate wrong."
"Your masturbation is only amateur. When you do it as much as me it becomes masterbate."

by Niladen September 3, 2013

Tasterbate

When you're craving a certain food but don't have the ingredients, so you just eat a different food and pretend its the food you're craving. **Not to be mistaken for masturbating, when you pretend your hand is a vagina.**

I'm craving noodles but don't have em, guess I just tasterbate.

by RookLovesRobertErhard July 25, 2011

Camsterbate

The act of mastermating on cam.

I barged in on Tom camsterbating with Susan and Janet. I didn't know they liked to camsterbate.

by CromwellsWorld April 18, 2009