Spanner

A long, unbroken turd which lays across the toilet bowl and will fold in half when the toilet is flushed (extremely rare)

I'm almost 40 years old and I've pinched only one spanner in my lifetime.

by Big Steve September 4, 2003

Spannered

Originating from the phrase 'to throw a spanner in the works' it can be used to say something is broken, or that someone is tired. Also ised as an insult in the noun form 'spanner'.

You've spannered my life up now you spanner. Now I must get some sleep since I am spannered.

by Dr Harry Koch January 22, 2005

Spanner

An unusually attractive girl - one who tightens your nuts!

"Check out that spanner, i would'nt mind getting into her toolbox!"

by Dainty Lardarse March 22, 2016

Spannering

Any form of mechanical work on a vehicle, be it a bicycle, motorcycle, car or even a lawnmower.

"What did you do at the weekend?"

"I spent all weekend in the garage spannering, got the car running again by Sunday"

by Arfski July 9, 2012

spanner

A nickname for a foxy girlfriend -

I call her spanner because every time she touches me, my nuts go tight

by AussieDave September 30, 2005

spannered

To make a right royal mess of things. When one would not have thought it possible.

Einstein spannered his IQ test and only got a result of 54. People thought that he was an idiot for years. (Not true - used for illustration purposes only).

by Edd Rayner January 16, 2004

spanner

1. A useless fish poker player who thinks they are the best.

2. A bad poker hand.

He went on Tilt after going all in preflop with 2 4 offsuit and losing. What an Absolute Spanner!

What were you doing going all in preflop after 2 re raises with that 2 4 offsuit Spanner hand anyway? You deserved to lose.

by Michael Falstead January 5, 2009