petsplain

The pet version of "mansplain"
When a person (who usually has no experience with raising the subject animal) tries to give you unsolicited advice about said animal.

My relative visits my house and sees my (fluffy and definitely not fat) cat.
Relative: He’s too heavy—he needs to lose a few pounds. You need to put him on X/Y diet.
Me: Thank you for petsplaining. I have taken Theodore to the vet and I can assure you he is just fluff.

I finally decide to get a dog after much planning.
Friend: You shouldn't get your dog now.
Me: Why not?
Friend: Well, dogs require a lot of time.
Me: Yes, do you know how much?
Friend: No, but it's a lot.
Me: Well I do know because I have spent a lot of time researching. Thank you for petsplaining and assuming that I will not be a responsible pet owner but I assure you I have more knowledge and determination than you think.

by spearmint_halls April 10, 2019

Petsplaining

The futile endeavor of explaining to your pets what they did wrong and expecting them to understand.

I explained to my puppy why it was wrong for him to pee on the carpet. Two hours later he peed on the carpet again. I should have realized petsplaining doesn’t work.

by rpcgal January 29, 2022

Pornsplain

when your friend asks you what a sext meant and you translate it in easy to understand terms

Let me pornsplain this for you: when Boo said he likes watching the travel while he’s giving you what you need, he’s talking about how he likes how your ass jiggles when he’s hitting it from the back.

by illiter8too February 15, 2018

Polisplaining

Polisplaining occurs when a politician or political commentator talks condescendingly to someone about something he / she has incomplete knowledge of, with the mistaken assumption that she / he knows more about it than the person he's talking to does.

I just spent the last hour listening to a group of talking head polisplaining an issue everyone knows they haven't seen (or don't have the clearance to see) the evidence.

by Against the tribes June 3, 2018

hotsplaining

A person who is hot/ on tik tok or youtube/ who explains basic things that most of the population didn't listen to in school, yet most of us already know, so we dont fucking care. we already know, shutup already

OMG THIS TIK TOK GIRL EXPLAINED THIS BASIC CONCEPT OF HOW SEX IS A DRIVING FORCE IN BIOLOGICAL CREATURES.

Yeah... i know....shes just hotsplaining it to you because you're dumb and only listen to tits

by Azraelz January 26, 2023

botsplaining

The explanation of a topic by an AI chatbot in a condescending and oversimplified manner that assumes that all humans are ignoramuses. Similar to mansplaining, the presumption of ignorance is built-in to the chatbot's training data set.

Human: Explain crypto like I am a 5-year old
Chatbot: It's like a big pink piggy bank with a blockchain that works like digital legos so that the government can't steal your sippy cup.
Human: Stop botsplaining me!

by Zombie in the Machine August 4, 2023

Puttsplaining

When a golfer, usually a bad golfer, misses a putt and then explains to everyone in the group that the reason the putt didn't go in was because it didn't break or it went straight when it should have gone right or left. This is despite everyone in the group knowing the puttsplainer is a shitty putter and that he/she had little chance to make this or any other putt attempted.

By the time Greg finished puttsplaining why he missed that six footer that everyone on the planet except him knows breaks six inches to the left, I was ready to get in the cart and go back to the clubhouse.

by McFlyJones June 7, 2024