The Colostomizer

The Colostomizer is a particularly sexy motherfucker, specifically with respect to his relative skill at any of a number of competitive endeavors. Whether it be videogames, sports, or pissing contests, The Colostomizer will fuck you up so badly that, once he's done with you, you'll be in desperate need of a colostomy bag (read: your asshole will be loose to the point that you can no longer control when you take a shit).

Jesus H. Christ, The Colostomizer just skullfucked you through your asshole! How does it feel to get sodomized by a freight train?

by Rapist Wit November 12, 2008

colostomy

Ostomy is a surgical procedure used to create an opening for urine and feces to be released from the body. Colostomy refers to a surgical procedure where a portion of the large intestine is brought through the abdominal wall to carry stool out of the body.

After getting shived in prison, Charles had to have a colostomy to rest and heal his injured colon. Little did he know he'd be getting raped in the side by phily side car aficionados.

by uptodate June 16, 2008

Colostomizer

Another word for a sex offender. The difference between a colostomizer and a sex offender, is that sex offenders normally target young children. A colostomizer targets older women in the 50-60 year old range. A colostomizer, just like a sex offender could do, may prefer men over women, and may engage in gay sex with the victim(s). A Colostomizer is very hard to find, and almost impossible to catch. After all, you don't find a colostomizer, a colostomizer finds you. Tactics include "The Damsel in the Distress", "This isn't where I parked my car", and the infamous "The Viagra Manuever." A colostomizer usually is pale, prefers a cold environment, and is a raving homosexual.

Also known as a douche bag.

Colostomizer: Hey there young lady! Here, let me escort you across the street.
Grandma: What a gentleman!
Colostomizer: The city is gettin' dangerous, let me escort you back to your home.
Grandma: Well, I suppose there's no harm in that.
(Unknown event(s) occur)
*Gay sex follows with Grandpa*

by FEDER4TION August 29, 2006

colostrophe

Noun: The catastrophic failure of a colostomy bag

Informal: An embarrassing event or occurrence

"I woke up after the stag next to my sister and wearing her thong. What a colostrophe!"

by Michael A A February 7, 2008

colostomy bag

Someone who is consistently full of shit, ie, a liar.

That Jacko is such a colostomy bag, only one nosejob? Riiiight!

by RachelS December 2, 2003

colostomybag

A colossal douchebag; Someone who has surpassed the levels of jerk, asshole, and blown pasting the upper echelons of douchebag status.

Javier's unabated shenanigans at our tea party last night puts him on a whole new level of douchebaggery, one which warrants an upgrade to colostomybag status!

by scoopapoopa August 13, 2011

colostomy bag fetish

The act of sticking your dick in the exposed intestine typically covered by the colostomy bag.

Daniel can get extra deep into Marco's colon. He has a colostomy bag fetish.

by ClarenceB0ddicker November 27, 2013