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big bang

A disproven theory that people bring up all the time anyways. If all matter was at infinite mass and infinitely small density it would not explode, it would become a black hole, the universe would end where it had begun. The universe has always been here and always will be and there is no easy happy way of looking at it. Don't believe me? Ask Hawking, and then stfu about the big bang.
Johnny: I believe in the big bang theory!
Bobby: ::breaks Johnny's jaw:: the universe has always been here and always will be, stop believing in any and every dumb little theory that makes you feel more secure in your existence and live with the fact that you'll never understand it.
Johnny: Well the broken jaw isn't so bad now that you've helped me no longer be a pussy! Thanks Bobby!
by Nikias November 1, 2005
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Big Bang

It's when you're fucking a chick from behind, and right as you're about to blow, you smash a watermelon over her head, yell "BANG" and cum all over the back of her head.
Dude, so last night I gave Patty the Big Bang, it was epic!
by mikami_teru_674 September 9, 2010
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big bang

Let's clear things up.
Time is not linear, neither is the expansion of the universe. As the amount of mass in the universe decreases time slows down.
In the big bang theory, the universe was a point of infinitely small and infinitely dense material.The universe started to expand, and as it expanded, time sped up, creating a seeming explosion in the size of the universe, but in reality the expansion rate is relative to the speed of time and the size of the universe. By this logic, time is speeding up as the universe expands.
There is no god, the universe has always been, none of that 6 days bullshit. It was the big bang.
by MuffinsAreFood March 6, 2008
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Big Bang

Either 6.5, 8.9, or 13.7 billion years ago (they keep rescheduling it), nothing blew itself up.
After the explosion, once the smoke had all faded and the dust had settled, a countless number of galaxies, systems, stars, and planets covered a presumed infinite amount of space.

What the hell?
"Hey, we currently have no explanation for the beginning of the universe, man."
"Well, just pick from the existing ones."
"We could do that, but, uh, sir..."
"What?"
"They all involve the supernatural and/or some sort of deity(s)."
"Holy crap! Heaven (which I don't believe exists) forbid we actually believe there are greater forces in the world than ourselves (arrogant brats aren't we?)! Quick, make something up!"
"How about... I know! A massive explosion created everything! We'll call it the 'Big Bang'."
"Think anyone will buy that?"
"If we come up with a bunch of nonsensical yet complex equations to back it up, yes."
"Do it."
by STJosh May 1, 2007
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big bang

rough sex that makes you cum in seconds!
i had a big bang last nite
by kinky biatch March 13, 2005
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big bang

a bullshit theory that just shows how much we like to see shit blow up
joe: how was the universe created?
bob: well, there was nothing, then it blew up and became something. its called the big bang.
joe: that sounds like the name of a fancy circle jerk
by Jezuz Munky April 19, 2008
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big bang

A sound that was heard in the restroom.
I just heard a loud noise in the restroom.
by David June 10, 2004
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