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The Car Keys Defense 

AKA "Car Keysing"
When a woman uses a real but unrelated example of physical danger as an excuse for harmful or toxic behavior by herself or other women towards men. The goal of "The Car Keys Defense" is to try to shut down a man's complaint about problems men face in modern dating life and/or wider society by bringing the discussion to women feeling unsafe, which will always trump a man's feelings. The term comes from women often citing they must "carry car keys between their knuckles when walking alone" to avoid discussing in some instances men are harmed by women's behavior online or in real life.
"I don't like when women just use Tinder for compliments. You know it's easy for you to find dates, but for men that's wasting their limited swipe rights they could have used for someone actually interested. It's harmful."
"Excuse me, I don't want to hear about men's problems when women have to walk with their car keys between their fingers at night because they are terrified of what a man might do to them. Nope. Sorry. Don't care."
"Don't use The Car Keys Defense just because you have unique and real problems of your own doesn't mean you can cause problems for others."

"I think it's really hypocritical that women have spent the last decade fighting for body positivity in media but see no problem with openly stating they won't date men under 6 feet. It's really hypocritical."
"Aw poor baby doesn't get enough matches? I have to make sure I give a friend what address I'm going to and a time I'll text back so they know I haven't been raped and murdered on a date, but go off about how women were mean to you."
"Car Keysing just to defend toxic body expectations? Slay queen!"
The Car Keys Defense by mrgreyho November 3, 2021
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T-Rex Defense

If an awkward girl won't leave you alone, make like Ian Malcolm and stop whatever conversation you were having to freeze like a statue. Her vision is based on movement and she will pass you by for tastier prey, like a T-Rex.
"Kelly from the bar came up to me last night and I couldn't shake her off, I had to utilize the T-Rex Defense in hopes she would move on and attack some lawyer guy on a toilet."
T-Rex Defense by Phil Hubbard September 13, 2008

bathrobe defense 

A last act of desperation. A staged performance of mental Incompetency calculated to excuse bad behavior or avoid consequences, e.g. parading in the streets in a bathrobe like Vito Gigante, “the Chin.”
The politician has become so desperate To explain his deplorable behavior that he’s pulling out his bathrobe defense.
bathrobe defense by Jean Dizzy December 25, 2019

the masturbation defense

The universal alibi used by criminal defense attorneys and criminals. The accused will use the "I was at home masturbating" defense to avoid conviction. Defense will provide dna evidence and semen samples to the prosicution resulting in an acquittal, mostly.
detective: Sir, we know you did it we know you lured those minors. you also have alot of teenage boys and girls on your facebook page. We have witnesses and physical evidence linking you to these crimes.

handjob Bob: I was at home masturbating, mostly. You want proof?

detective: "The masturbation defense" huh? you have surviellance video of you masturbating?

handjob Bob: Better, I have DNA evidence and witnesses who can back that up.

ROBLOX Tower Defense Simulator 

A popular game with over half a billion visits. The point is to defeat waves of zombies by placing troops or towers to defend the exit. There are 4 gamemodes: Beginners', Molten, Golden, and Fallen. Fallen mode will be required to beat Hidden Wave, which will be activated if a player completes all the 40 waves in less than 1009 seconds, or 16 minutes 49 seconds. You can get the Cowboy skin in Badlands if you beat it in Molten, Golden or Fallen mode, though Fallen has a chance to activate the Hidden Wave, so it is not recommended. You can also use certain codes to get certain troops or certain skins. You get daily rewards if you log in every day. In Day 7 you get a Premium Skincrate. This is a fun game in ROBLOX, so go check it out!
Janet: Played ROBLOX Tower Defense Simulator before?
Dustin: Yeah! It's super cool!
Janet: Hey, then, do you have the Outlaw?
Dustin: Nah, but I have the Cowboy.

Chewbacca defense 

A nonsensical or illogical legal defense (especially one postulated by an unpopular defendant such as Microsoft or RIAA). The phrase comes from the animated TV series South Park, where an attorney exhorts a jury to acquit his client based solely on his contradictory arguments.
"Although my client's fingerprints were all over the murder weapon and he was seen by 50 eyewitnesses at the scene of the crime, the Sun rises in the East so you must find him innocent."

depp defense 

When an abusive man, even one previously convicted of spousal abuse, lies as a way to dismiss or excuse his own abuse towards her. This is often accompanied by a social campaign against her and the suppression of her evidence in court that he was abusive.
My abusive ex husband who nearly put me in the hospital is pulling a Depp defense.
depp defense by HeardHer June 26, 2022