The French Muffin 

The French Muffin is the art of defecating into your own hand, molding it into a muffin, and devouring it before it gets cold.

Also refer to French Soup.

Barry loves the French Muffin.

The French Muffin by Jakobeson November 23, 2006

Pardon My Non-French 

Pardon my non-French can be said after one uses a curse word in either polite company, or not-so-polite company. For curse words such as F-Bombs, The "S" Word, and Dam spelled differently are clearly not of French origin--unless you are saying Foutre, Merde, or Zut! Then, perhaps it will be appropriate to use the more conventional, "Pardon my French".

As Suzie is walking into her mother's toenail trimmer shop, she trips and sprains her pinkie finger. "Fuck all! That fucking hurts!" Said Suzie. "Suzie!" "Pardon my Non-French", mum, but that hurt like a motherfucker!"

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In contrast . . . Charlie is perusing the classical pornography gallery, when he stumbles into a display. His trundling clumsiness results in the shattered remnants of a 16th century Faberge didlo - imported from Queen Dinara's private and controversial collection. Upon seeing the previously proud display of faux manhood in shambles, Charlie immediately exclaimed: "Merde!" When he was frowned upon by a tiny old lady wearing rain boots, he promptly corrected himself. "Pardon my French. Der'mo!"

Pardon My Non-French by Jessika Lynn Stone January 8, 2011

faux french kiss

Where one person takes a drag on a cigarette or weed and then kisses another person sending the smoke into that persons mouth and then out their nose. It's almost impossible to do correctly, but totally classy and sexy once you do.

They faux french kissed on the beach and she thought she knew he was her soul-mate.

faux french kiss by Katie J. December 20, 2004

Bulgarian French Kiss 

This decadent procedure requires two people. You start by having one person invert his or her anus and pull out at least three inches (the more the merrier) of inside-out colon. The other partner then forcefully grasps this handful of chocolate flume and injects it with botox, causing it to become firm and rigid. Once this is done, the other partner can proceed to vigorously insert this hardened mud tube into his own, thereby simulating a french kiss.

If you really want to liven things up, both partners should be sure to take a few laxatives before beginning.

Matt: "Hey Chris, since we are flaming homos, how about a Bulgarian French kiss?"
Chris: "I was just thinking the same thing! Good thing I just took an entire bottle of laxatives!"

Bulgarian French Kiss by EhEsDeEf November 3, 2010

bessie french 

The act of vigorously eating out a cows arsehole and then making out with one's significant other then proceeding to tell them what you have done.

Bob:hmmmm...which one ah. she looks nice and old.
*munch*
*slop*
*MOOOOOOOO*

~later that evening~

Linda:OH god that tastes like...GOD DAMMIT BOB,Bessie French AGAIN!!!

bessie french by Cattlin December 30, 2007

Quebecois French 

Just another pathetic attempt by Quebecois to make Quebec different from the rest of the French speaking world. Quebec also likes to change spelling to suit them too. Martinique and Ivory Coast speak proper official French contrary to what Quebecoiss may think. It is Quebec that likes to change their vocab to suit them and seperate themselves further from French culture.

Quebecois need to read the French dictionary and learn to spell!

Quebecois French by loops January 13, 2005

wyatt french 

stupid

mean
wears glasses

Oakley's
has one friend mason the memester

girls don't like him

is a dick head = Wyatt french

wyatt french by fdjhfkwfjhkeldjfhkfdl May 24, 2018