wank jank

A guy that is so into himself that his junk don't stank.

Larry played shuffleboard like a wank jank.

by Robert Smashalablob February 27, 2014

Wank Pants

pants worn commando which are easily pushed down to the floor for ideal dick access when porn opportunity arises

popular item of clothing in middle school and high school as powerul elastic waste band secures boner against chest in jerk stop emergency. For best results boner should cover two inches above belly button when Wank Pants restrained

the instant the front door closed behind his mom he had his Wank Pants completely on the floor crumpled around his ankles, sitting at the computer, porn playing, jerking his lubed dick, eager to nutt on his chest

boners that strongly point forward while standing need a belt instead of Wank Pants

by margrette sees January 18, 2013

suicide wank

When your having a wank, just before blow the load, shout out "Mom" or "Dad", then try and finish the job before they get into your room!

a friend tried a suicide wank and won!!! he did it and failed the second time!!

by Shane Hassett January 13, 2008

wank pheasant

A olde British insult, for a useless and lame person

Roman Reigns is a wank pheasant

by E211 June 23, 2016

Academic Wank

Academic Wank describes a writing method employed by students of any subject, (but especially psychology,) who may not necessarily have all the facts at their fingertips, but need to pad-out an essay with some generalised waffle in order to meet the minimum word-count requirement for the coursework set. Often used most in the early hours of the morning before a deadline, academic wank must be employed alongside content with actual intellectual merit in order to not result in a fail. Requires less research than an essay that will get you a first class degree.

"The research methods essay? yeah, I didn't use enough references really, but I typed out some academic wank and handed it in anyway."

by Laraweasil April 3, 2009

Medicinal Wank

Masturbation as a medicinal tonic rather than for pure pleasure, with the purpose of relieving a condition such as stress or insomnia or for the promotion of general well being.

"I'll have a quick medicinal wank and be off to sleep in no time"
"I was getting quite stressed, but a medicinal wank calmed me down"
"A wank a day keeps the doctor away"

by Dr Cockshuffle MD October 12, 2012

sick wank

When you are sick and you think wanking it will make you feel better. Instead it just makes you feel infinitely worse.

I was sick the other day and I decided that a sick wank it would be a good decision. Man was I wrong. It just gave me a huge headache.

by burntheblobs12 April 19, 2010