This…is my Jesus 

This…is my Jesus is a flexibly productive ejaculation describing any person; event; timing, or situation P.E.T.S that nurtures a person as he or she experiences a tremendous personal growth spurt while maximizing their human potential. For some people it may actually be Jesus; but for others it could be a city; a person; love; a drug; a mystical experience; or a damn good burger with all the fixings. The use of this saying is very individually driven. Often usages of this saying conflict. It takes balls to use this expression publicly..

Here are some examples of how to use “This…is my Jesus” in a sentence:

Man eating a Fat Burger:”Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, this burger is my Jesus!”
Offended friend sitting with him: FOOL!!!!!! “Jesus is my Jesus”.

Man smoking particularly good Hawaiian Kona Kush exhaling and saying: “This Kush is my Jesus.”

A single man spending a month in Amsterdam overlooking the canal: “This city is my Jesus.”

This…is my Jesus by Mind Hunter the Profiler January 29, 2023

Mach Jesus 

A term used to describe an objects insanely high rate of speed.

joe: why were you late for work today mike?

mike: cause the douche-bag who drives the bus insists that he blow by my stop at Mach Jesus so he doesnt have to pick anyone up, so i missed it.

Mach Jesus by Sadistic11B January 15, 2009

Creepin Jesus

Creepin Jesus is a term used by the tow trucking industry to describe those who who are act as their dogsbody. The Creepin Jesus is never allowed to perform anything but the most basic of menial tasks, yet they think that they are invaluable to the industry and can often be heard telling whoever will listen, how many friends they have and how important they are. Sometimes the Creepin Jesus will take exception to their name, so other names, such as Bozo and Fuckhead are often substituted. It is easy to identify a Creepin Jesus. Just look for someone in a wheelchair and the Creepin Jesus will be the one running away.

They call him Creepin, Creepin Jesus.

Creepin Jesus by Kung Of The Duckheads August 26, 2019

Lesbian Jesus 

“Lesbian Jesus” is given to the holy, Hayley Kiyoko a singer, by her fans.

Lesbian Jesus strikes again

I love you Lesbain Jesus

Lesbian Jesus by KJace005 May 21, 2018

Taco Jesus 

When a female is ravished and starving, because her man has fucked her brains out for hours, yet she can’t even move To get nourishment because of how hard she has been dicked down.......and out of nowhere her BF brings her a fresh, home made taco, warmed, and on a plate, w napkin, for her to consume in bed. Taco Jesus

1. I was laying there stunned, and then the next thing I know, like a sign from above....there is a hot man, handing me a perfectly warm and delicious taco......Taco Jesus had arrived.

2. Do you know how many women would kill for just one night with Taco Jesus, honey you better wake up, and marry that man. That shit don’t happen anymore with fuckboys and Opie’s everywhere!

Taco Jesus by GIRTHQUAKE72 November 20, 2019

Freckled jesus 

Freckled Jesus:

Marco bodt from the anime Attack on Titan, known for his freckles. When Jean imagines Marco in front of him, a light shines behind Marco. That making Marco freckled jesus.

"Freckled jesus take the wheel!"

Freckled jesus by TheNerdyMonstah January 2, 2014

Come to Jesus talk

A serious talk between two or more people where the person's performance, or attitude, or involvement in the work (or in the relationship) is in need of improving. The talk is meant to save the soul of the receiver so that he or she makes a full change for the better. Often between a person of authority and the subordinates (teacher-student; coach-team), and often uses emotional arguments to get the person to change.

Our professor gave us that come to Jesus talk today. He said we were performing poorly, lacked the right drive to complete the task. He said that he was working hard, trying to make good lesson plans but we were just lazy. The worst part was when he said that he felt that he wasn't a good teacher because we clearly didn't respect him as a teacher.

Come to Jesus talk by Writingbear December 5, 2015