Jesus Boner

A boner so holy that divine light is shed upon it and a choir of alter boys sing in the background. Morning wood becomes morning good.

That hoe got the Jesus Boner, nah mean?
(The choir passes in a catholic bus)

by Narcoleptic Cactus June 17, 2018

Homer Boner

What you leave with with after hitting a game-winning home run at your softball game.

“Dude, I had such a homer boner last night after hitting that home run. First I slid into home, then I slid into my wife.”

by Wafflebender July 10, 2018

Reluctant Boner

A sudden, uncontrollable erection , that mysteriously springs up at the most innappropriate times imaginable. Such as; during job interviews for teaching pisitions, while testifying in front of a jury when your looking at life in prison, during political debates when your running for office, on your wedding night dancing with all your in laws but not when you dance with your wife, and when meeting your girlfriends five year old Bruce for the first time. Often , medical intervention is necassary, and you probably will need to retain a lawyer as most people report reluctant boners as sexual assaults. These are highly embarrassing erections , and can sometimes be fatal. Be prepared to leave town, as trying to explain a reluctant boner just makes it worse.

My ass is red as,my cheeks because a reluctant boner made an unfortunate appearance just as I met my girlfriend's baby sister and now I've got to move out of town.

by Triflegirl August 11, 2018

bob boner

When you are watching Bob Ross and you get a massive boner

I was watching Bob Ross earlier and suddenly I because very erect, giving me a huge bob boner

by Who’s That February 1, 2019

Clout Boner

When someone feels an urge to do something that will give them social status. Similar to a watering mouth after smelling food, a clout boner comes after a realization of a clout-giving opportunity.

Guy 1: My parents are gone this week and I’m gonna throw a sick rager and invite Jessica and her popular friends
Guy 2: Damn bro chill with the clout boner

by daddyjacuebo February 6, 2019

boner trap

When a guy gives up his happiness or possibility at success in order to bone a girl.

Jimmy: Yeah he didn't want to join our team because he wanted to be with Jennifer.
Corey: Dude, he got boner trapped.

by coherency September 5, 2018

Satisfaction boner

When something that somebody says or does turns you on so much you get a boner

Wow the way that Clarissa woke me up gave me a satisfaction boner

by Daddy mc dick in yo ribs June 7, 2018