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Goldfish

The cheese-flavored snack that supposedly smiles back, but tends to vary in that regard. Some Goldfish are all smiles, but others appear to have no smile at all. Interesting.

The original is usually the best, and with Goldfish, that is no exception. The "flavor blasted" varieties are absolutely disgusting, and the person who thought that making pizza-flavored crackers shaped like fish was absolutely fucked in the head.

Goldfish are promoted by a band of anthropomorphic fish, which are thoroughly annoying, and somewhat detract from the enjoyment of the crackers. The leader of this band of fish is named "Finn" (Ha Ha), and is somehow able to wear sunglasses, despite having eyes on the side of his head, and having no nose. He is also joined by other fish, one of which is named "X-Treme". I can only assume that he was born in the 90's. X-Treme also represents the 'Flavor blasted" variety, which happens to be the exact reason why I despise X-Treme.

The crackers are produced by Pepperidge Farms, and sold internationally. They are quite good. In fact, I am eating some at this moment (the original flavor, duh).
Person- "you want some Goldfish?'
Me- "Hell yeas"
Person- (Pours Goldfish into my hands)
In unison- "The snack that smiles back!"
by Supreme_Sucks March 23, 2017
mugGet the Goldfishmug.

Goldfish

yall got any drugs, or goldfish

Man this shit is better that my mamas pussy lips, and goldfish.
by ray the gay February 25, 2023
mugGet the Goldfishmug.

Goldfishing

The act of intentionally or unintentionally spacing out when someone is talking to you

Can be perceived as uninterested or a form of passive aggression
John: Hey Mark, why doesn't that girl talk to us anymore?
Mark: Dude, I goldfished her and I think she got the message.
John: Oh ok, but next time tell me when you are goldfishing.
by GweenYunYan December 9, 2021
mugGet the Goldfishingmug.

Pretzel goldfish

a male person with an STD
“Hey Stacy, you gonna hit that?” *points at a guy*

“Nah Rebecca, he’s a pretzel goldfish.”
by Your boiyiyiyiyiy December 19, 2017
mugGet the Pretzel goldfishmug.

Goldfish

The polar opposite of a catfish; not photogenic but really attractive in person
Carolina is such a goldfish it’s great!
by CrustMstBust December 28, 2023
mugGet the Goldfishmug.

Goldfishing

I'm pornography, when the guy is ready to cum he takes his penis from his co-star, the co-star gets on their knees, looks skyward with mouth agape and eagerly awaits bring fed. Just like Goldfish in a tank when they see that food is about to be put in the water.

My gf and I came up with this term a couple years ago while watching porn and realized we hated the act. Like anybody in the real world would jump up from the position they were in and ruin their moment by being splattered with a disgusting goo.
I thought she was really conservative but then I saw her Goldfishing for the entire rugby team Saturday night.
by Mike Oxbernt June 21, 2023
mugGet the Goldfishingmug.

angry goldfish

Oral sex performed with a mouthful of chewed up crackers, preferably of the goldfish brand, but any cracker will work
That freak gave me an angry goldfish! She salty as fuck!
by Pauljamal May 7, 2018
mugGet the angry goldfishmug.

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